Over the Threshold

Coffee Friday

2012-01-27T10:16:00.006-05:00

I don't have a special post for you all this week and my special series on organizing is over. Thanks for all your comments during the series--seemed like a lot of people enjoyed it! Any suggestions for new topics?

I don't have a new post because I've been trying to catch up on posts about the holidays. I got really behind on blogging and I'm just now recording those stories. It's important to me to still get those written though, for the family that read the blog and for my own sort of diary purposes on the blog. Feel free to read the following that interest you, but know that they are mostly for family, but do have some special news about our next nephew to arrive on the scene :-)

A CunninghamThanksgiving
Newwwwwwwww York! Newwww York! (And other NEW things!)
Christmas in Denver
In the 'Cord
A quarter century

A quarter century

2012-01-27T07:00:00.000-05:00

We celebrated twenty-five years of Brice this year--wow, so old :-) Since his birthday was on a Monday, we decided to go out for his birthday the Saturday before. We thought we would go to Philly, but didn't see anything going on that we were really interested in. My parents had given us a couple of gift cards for Christmas and Olive Garden is one of Brice's favorite places. We had a great dinner there and no wait since we were lucky enough to be able to get a bar table right away.

On his actual birthday we went to Buffalo Wild Wings to watch the game since we only get two channels. We love the seasoned wings they have that are much less mess.

My co-workers were attending a UD women's basketball game on Thursday. My friends I work with on Thursdays thought it would be fun to meet each others husbands/families since we hear so much about them, so Brice and another co-worker's husband joined us for dinner. My other co-worker's husband stayed home with their three kids and just met us for the game. It was nice to meet everyone finally. The game was interesting since UD has one of the top players in women's basketball in the country. She was recruited to UConn, but she was homesick and came back to town to play for UD. There's no way UD could recruit her.

We found something fun to do in Philly for the next weekend so we went to the Brazilian Steakhouse we wanted to do for Brice's birthday. (Men love those places--all you can eat meat!) I had bought tickets for us to go to a show at a place called World Cafe Live. It was a neat venue I'm glad we found, but the show itself was just alright. We had a fun night overall though.

Last weekend Brice declared he wanted us to cook something together that required a lot of prep. We settled on chicken cordon bleu and risotto. I was very impressed with his risotto; very creamy and he stood there stirring and stirring for an hour. Nice. I was disappointed because I skipped a step in my chicken (still turned out fine), but it really didn't measure up to the risotto.

Today Brice is flying to Germany again while I spend another long weekend in upstate NY, weather permitting. This will be my last visit up there before the move.

My last days at work are also approaching. A new semester starts February 6th which will be my last day. I am taking nine hours for the semester so I'll have plenty to keep me busy with packing during our last weeks here in the states.

Paper!!!

2012-01-20T07:00:00.003-05:00

Thanks for joining us again as we conclude with part 3 in a 3 part series on organization. See last week's post here.

The action that can make the biggest impact in the organization of your home is to reduce your paper clutter.

Mail. There is no reason to receive credit card statements, bank statements, or bills in the mail anymore. Fix this. Set up online banking and bill pay. Sign up to be removed from junk mail lists. Keep a recycling bin handy and sort your mail out immediately—time yourself, but it can’t take more than 2 minutes to get rid of all the junk. Recycle, throw away or shred every envelop as soon as you open it an remove the desirable contents.

Other incoming paper. Stop coming home from events with paper. Decide before you leave if you really need this piece of paper. If you don’t read your newspaper, admit it to yourself and stop getting it. If you do not log every purchase you make, stop saving receipts for anything but major purchases and items you might return, or at least throw them away as soon as you’ve checked them against your online (that’s right, online) statement.

Kids. Let’s be honest; most of your paper clutter is coming from your kids. Take a digital picture of every art project (or let Johnny do it himself—good opportunity to teach some basic camera skills) and then either mail the project to Grandma or store it in a folder or bin. If you or your kid don’t pull it out again during the school year, toss it. You still have all the digital pictures you can make into a book on a photo site. As far as all those sheets coming home from school and all the other activities, you need to do the same thing as with the mail. Take a look and figure out if you need this sheet of paper, or if the information can quickly be transferred to your calendar. If you need to save it, deposit the paper into whatever strategy you’ve decided works best for you; usually a folder or binder. Now comes the hard part; no matter how organized all those papers are, they will never stay that way unless you suck it up and every so often and go through and get rid of them. (I do advocate recycling the majority of your paper and any other items you decide to purge if the items are recyclable. Try IKEA for odd items you may think can't be recycled.)

You want to be organized; it's a natural desire. Organization just comes a bit more naturally to some than others. You may be a person who has to work a little harder, but organizational behaviors can be learned. The most important concepts I have tried to apply to my own life are mostly contained in this post. Ask me for any more help you may need.

Concepts

2012-01-13T07:54:00.005-05:00

Thanks for joining us again as we continue with part 2 in a 3 part series on organization. See last week's post here.

The most important concepts of organization are:

Purging. Go through your stuff as often as possible and just get rid of all the extra stuff you don’t need. It’s weighing you down. You’ll feel so much better, I promise. If you find you’re very emotional and sentimental about your stuff or someone else’s, I recommend this article from Real Simple. (To make purging even easier, don’t let all that stuff into your house in the first place—if you won’t really use it or enjoy it, don’t buy it!)

Flexibility. Just because something works well for you doesn’t mean it will for other members of your household. Your kids might not be the kids who do homework best in their room alone. If not, figure out a way to make your kid doing his homework at the kitchen table a feasible situation. Sometimes the best way to develop your organization is by sitting back and watching natural flow of things and then implementing an organizational strategy.

Everything needs a home. The title of last week's post says it all. You will always have some kind of clutter in your house until you get this concept. Every single thing that comes into your house needs to be assigned a place to “live”. Just because it’s a purse and you have a place for purses doesn’t mean you have room for THIS purse. You might need to donate one you don’t use anymore to make room for the new one.

Next week: Reducing your paper clutter

Recent creations from my kitchen...

2012-01-07T14:19:00.006-05:00

This was probably 2 months ago now, and I forgot to post, but I did make this again last week(sans photos)...

I felt this turkey meatloaf turned out particularly well.

And anyone who has had a Red Lobster Cheddar Bay Biscuit knows that they are one of the best foods in the world. This morning (while trying to use up things in my pantry before moving), I made Bisquik biscuits and got the idea to try my hand at them with half. Not to brag, but they are super close in taste and texture to the real thing--even closer than my homemade Bojangles.

And here is my Cheddar Bay Biscuit if it wanted to audition for an '80s cookbook. (Seriously, doesn't this picture look old or something?)

A place for everything

2012-01-06T07:05:00.007-05:00

Today begins a three-part series on organizing.

I read a lot of magazines with organizing tips and after a while, you start to not see anything all that new. So in case you’re not the type to read that stuff, but you are the type to need the help, here is the best advice I’ve been able to glean in a step by step format.

Decide. Figure out where you want to start. You can’t organize a whole house in one day unless it was organize pretty recently. Pick a manageable area. If you have a whole house to organize, decide what reasonable areas would be to work with until the project is complete. Examples: A hall closet, your pantry, half your kitchen cabinets, one bathroom.

Assess. What is it that this space currently is? What is it that you want this space to be? What would make storage and organization in this area easier? Example: What you have is a catch all storage closet with everything that doesn't have any other place to go. You want a dedicated coat closet for outwear and bags.

Sort. Everything in the space is in one of two categories: should be there or shouldn’t be there. (Yes, very possibly some of what shouldn’t be there is trash, but still, it shouldn’t be there.) Relocate items you want to keep; trash, recycle, or donate everything you don't. Examples: You probably don't mean to keep a casserole dish in your coat closet, but that's where it ended up. Get rid of the broken sandals from two years ago that you loved. Recycle all those plastic bags--you don't need 200, or even 50. Donate your kids old coats and gloves.

Reassess. Once you have everything that you want to be in the space, spend some time thinking and talking to household members about what would make using this space easier. Pay special attention to small voices—it’s more important than you may realize. Be willing to let go of your own set ways in place of cooperative organization. Examples: If you would really prefer all shoes to be neatly in closets, but your household can’t get the hang of it, notice where they do keep shoes and find a way to make things organized where they already are. Also, reflect on why it is that you don’t want the household member to leave an item in a certain location. If the reason you don’t want an item on a table is because it’s difficult to get the table cleared, provide a basket where the person can put his or her belongings for quick and easy removal.

Implement. Begin returning the correct items to the space with the ideas you brainstormed in mind. Examples: Your daughter said a lower hook would help her put her jacket away on her own, rather than leaving it on the floor for you to hang on a hanger in the closet. Your son said that a basket in your living room would make cleaning up toys easier, rather than having to take everything upstairs to put away. You realized that simply buying more hangers would make you put away your clothes more often.

Next week: Most important concepts of organization

In the 'Cord

2012-01-05T22:14:00.001-05:00

Just after returning from Denver, we spur of the moment decided to drive to Concord for a long weekend.

Brice's brothers were all still in town so the five of us went mini-golfing. I joined the four of them and their dad at a beer tasting downtown (no beer for me). We also played a game of Bezzer Wizzer here and there during the visit.I got a coffee visit with Heather and Jessica on Friday morning. Heather couldn't stay long, she was headed out of town that day for work and then back home after visiting her family and in-laws for Christmas. On my way home, I got to stop for some Bojanlges' that I never get here in my new home. I met up with Jess and her mom later for some shopping at Southpark mall and then we went to a Greek restaurant. It was all sooo good. I went back to her mom's and we all watched an episode of Gilmore Girls, just like that old days.

I spent Saturday with my parents and accompanied them to War Horse. I know it's nominated for some awards, but personally, I thought it was sort of slow at the beginning. Jessica came over to ring in the new year with us that night and we had another game of Bezzer Wizzer and some champagne.

The next morning I accompanied my parents to church and got to see a lot of people. Before we left town that afternoon we met our friend Ryan for lunch at Bojangles'--again :-)

Christmas in Denver

2012-01-04T22:10:00.001-05:00

This Christmas was a different for us. My brother and his wife, Brian and Ashley, invited our family to Denver for Christmas last year. I was excited for this since it would be the first major holiday (Thanksgiving or Christmas) that I had spent with my brother since 2006. This spring, they told us there would be an extra person present! (See a brief synopsis of Gabriel Benjamin's birthday in the previous post.) Since the baby arrived for Christmas, my sister-in-law's family also flew out for Christmas; her mother with her husband and her brother with his wife. Her family stayed at another house and our family stayed at another house.

Since we were flying out of Philly on the 22nd, we decided to do presents early at home and just do gifts among our family in Denver. We just woke up on the 22nd and pretended that it was Christmas. We finished our Advent calendar, had cinnamon buns, and opened all the presents. Our gifts this year were centered around things we would need or wanted to have for our movie to Germany and not acquiring extra stuff that would just be in storage. My big gift was an iPod touch. I've already got it set up with a conversion app to quickly conver Euros to dollars, Celsius to Fahrenheit, MPH to KPH, etc. and Google Translate and lots of other apps that will make living in Germany easier. Isn't technology great?

Our flight was supposed to be that afternoon around 4 PM, but a snowstorm in Denver kept causing our flight to be delayed a few times. We finally arrived in Denver around 11 PM. My brother and my mom picked us up and we went to meet our new nephew for the first time. He's absolutely adorable and such a good baby. He did, however, poop in my arms within the first fifteen minutes of me holding him. (He continued this practice until the last night we were there getting a 75% return rate on a poop within fifteen minutes every time I held him.) We only stayed a little while since it was late and then headed over to the house where Brice and I were staying with my parents.

The next morning all of the men went to a shooting range while the women hung out at my brother's house with my sister-in-law and the baby where we planned Christmas dinner. All of the women except Ashley met up with the men at a gourmet hotdog shop for lunch. It was pretty impressive with all the options--I got a buffalo dog. Next we all went to the REI flagship store nearby and enjoyed looking at gear in the huge store. We split up at that point and Brice and I went with my parents to the grocery store to shop for Christmas dinner.

The next day Brice, Brian, Mom, Dad, and I took the lightrail to the 16th Street Mall. This is an outdoor shopping area along what would be 16th street, but no traffic is on it, just shoppers. We spent some time ice skating. This was our first time on hockey skates so we were pretty unsteady despite having done a bit of skating this winter. It's really different trying to skate with hockey skates. We had a fun lunch at Noodles & Co., a restaurant that serves all kinds of specialty mac & cheese dishes (Italian, Asian, Mexican).

Since it was Christmas Eve, the whole gang watched Miracle on 34th Street at Brian and Ashley's while Brian and I put together a meal of ribs, macaroni and cheese, and green beans. Brian was helping lead the Christmas Eve service that night (he's a minister, did I mention?) so Brice and I were sure to attend with my parents. The church's choir does a period of music prior to the service that was beautiful--one of the best Christmas Eve services I've ever attended.

Still somewhat jet-lagged, Brice and I skipped church on Christmas morning and were picked up later by my parents. We decided it would be easiest to prepare all of our food and eat at the church (it's across the street from Brian and Ashley's) so we headed over there. I was in charge of making mashed potatoes and crescent rolls. We had some hiccups in our cooking with only having a working convection oven that needed to be at 400 degrees (can't remember why) so I had a challenge in figuring out how to bake my rolls. I finally figured it out with the last batch, but forgot that it was still in there because the shelf it was on was not visible through the door. Oh, well. The inside was still good and the potatoes were great. We had a huge feast of turkey, stuffing, ham, sweet potato casserole, asparagus and more with desserts, too. It was great.

We decided to wait on eating dessert and packed and cleaned things up to go back over to Brian and Ashley's to do presents. We exchanged amongst our family and also received a stocking from Ashley's mother with lots of candy and some other gifts. Brice's parents had been sure to also send us elf hats full of small gifts that was shipping-worthy. We were even able to have a Facetime chat with Brice's whole family with my new iPod.

Daoust family

The next day Brice, Brian, Mom, Dad, and I went to a meadery in Colorado Springs. I had been there during my visit in May and decided I really like mead. We got a tour this time and sampled. I would have bought some if I didn't have to get it back home somehow. Brian had a burger place in mind that wasn't too far away so we ventured over there. We had some amazing french fries cooked in truffle oil with parsley and parmesan on top--yum!

My birthday was the next day, but we were flying out in the afternoon so we went out for my birthday dinner that night. I had seen Beau Jo's during my last visit, but hadn't been there yet, so that was my pick for dinner. Before we went out, I got to hold Gabriel for over an hour with no poop! Ashley's mom and her husband volunteered to babysit him so that Ashley could go out of the first time sans baby. I felt honored it was for my birthday :-) This place says they have "Colorado style pizza"--it was some pretty good pizza with a practice of dipping the crust in honey. Not sure that I thought the honey thing was great, but I enjoyed the pizza. Since it was my birthday I got a free drink :-) There was also a guy there balloon creations (his name was Bryce!) and he came over and made a fantastic balloon hat for me:
The next morning the five of us drove out to Red Rocks, the outdoor concert hall built into the side of a hill. Awesome place. Everybody who's anybody has performed there. We had a quick lunch of Christmas dinner leftovers at the church before we were dropped off for our flight.
It was a nice visit with plenty of snow and cold, but sad to leave Gabriel. Not sure when we'll see him again, but I hope to get plenty of Skype calls from him :-)

Do you believe?

2011-12-21T15:08:00.003-05:00

You know that Christmas is the day we celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ. That's where we get the name Christmas. When God sent his son Jesus to us, he sent him for two reasons: to live for us and to die for us. Jesus died for our sins so that we can live forever in heaven with him. But he also lived for us and gave us the example of how we should live our lives. Jesus wants us to have a generous spirit and give to others, especially the poor, in his name.

God loved us and gave Jesus to us. Jesus loved us and gave his life. Jesus showed us how to love and give to others, and that's what we do every year. We don't give gifts to each other because we have to; only because we want to out of a loving and generous spirit, like Jesus had.

You receive gifts from someone else too, though. Children around the world believe in Santa Claus, but they all call him different names in their own languages.

A long time ago in Greece, there was a boy named Nicholas. He was a Christian, just like we are. His family taught him from a very young age to be a good follower of Jesus. Nicholas did a lot of very nice things for many people and became well-known for his great generosity in the name of Jesus. He became known as St. Nicholas to Christians. St. Nicholas loved children and enjoyed giving to them. He began a tradition of bringing gifts to children while they were sleeping once a year early in December. Then he decided, since Christmas was a time to be joyous and and celebrate Jesus's birth, that would be the time he would bring gifts for everyone.

St. Nicholas's name sounds different in different countries, but he is the same good man. You usually call him Santa Claus. I don't know everything about St. Nicholas or Santa Claus, but it's not important to know everything. We don't know everything about God, but we know the important things, like how much he loves us.

We do a lot of things each Christmas that help us celebrate this wonderful time. All of these things help to make us feel happy and loved like God wants us to be. But all of the things we do to celebrate are like ornaments on our Christmas tree; if all the ornaments were gone, it wouldn't stop being a Christmas tree. If you didn't get presents, or if we didn't have a big meal, or if we didn't get to see all of the people we loved, it would still be Christmas. Christmas, above all else is the day God gave us the best gift of all: Jesus.

Someday, that is what I will tell our children about Christmas presents and Santa Claus. Yes, I'm going to tell them about Santa Claus. Because I believe in Santa Claus.

Recently I was reading an advice column where a parent asked what to do if another child told your child there was no Santa Claus. After the etiquette portion of how to speak to the other child's parent, advice was given on supporting your child's belief. The expert said the most important thing was to assert to your child that you believe in Santa. When the writer was surprised, he replied, "Well, don't we all believe in Santa in one way or another?"

We do. I believe in Santa.

Santa is a wonderful, happy, giving spirit asking nothing in return.
Now read that sentence again with Santa not as a noun, but as an adjective.

Santa is bringing joy to others.
Now read that sentence again with Santa not as a noun, but as a verb.

What do you think? Do you believe in Santa?

Newwwwwwww York! Newwww York! (And other NEW things!)

2011-12-14T18:09:00.002-05:00

After my final exam for the semester, Brice and I took a weekend trip to New York City. We'd been trying to plan a trip there since the summer since it's only a couple of hours away. I have two cousins who live there together (they are cousins also). Katrina has lived in the city for awhile and Tim moved there in the last couple of years. They both work in the arts, so NYC is good place for them. Tim works at NY1 (this is the station How I Met Your Mother is spoofing with News1) and Katrina works at the American Symphony.

We arrived late Friday night and caught up while also watching a movie for which my cousin Tim had written some music. Katrina had procured some awesome NY bagels for us for breakfast and ran out to get some more in the morning. How wonderful to live so close to such good bagels :-) Tim had to work so Brice, Katrina, and I headed out to check out Central Park and the Christmas storefronts. We hit some of the highlights of the park; the Bow Bridge, Strawberry Fields, and ice skating rink. The line for FAO Schwartz was insane for someone without kids to wait in, but I was considering it... We were most impressed with Bergdorf's displays--out of the ordinary, but amazing elements. One was entirely paper!

We headed over to the Village where Tim works and grabbed some lunch on the way. Tim had a break and was able to meet us for a cold walk on the High Line. The High Line is an old elevated train line turned into a park. It's a pretty cool concept. We made plans to meet up again for dinner at Five Napkin for burgers. Katrina, Brice, and I headed back uptown to the stores and shopped in an insanely busy Macy's and saw the light show at Saks. We watched the skaters at Rockefeller and saw the big tree. It was your basic chance to check "NYC at Christmas" off the bucket list.

Katrina & Tim on the High Line overlook.

Five Napkin was busy when we got there, but Tim winked at the waitress or something and got table. We enjoyed some great burgers and an appetizer of deep fried pickles and pastrami--very good. Then we went looking for an authentic NY dessert and found a place rated highly for its cheesecake in Times Square. It just happened to be next door to The Lion King so we got a chance to see where our show would be the next night. The four of us headed to a bar for a drink and to warm up in the bitter cold and then headed home. (Tim was especially glad he'd bought himself a new hat that day.)

Sunday morning Brice and I paid a visit to the Met. We saw some very small fraction of it in the couple of hours we were there and then taxied over to Carnegie Hall where we saw a free concert of the American Symphony Orchestra, thanks to Katrina who was working the show. Tim met us there and was able to enjoy the show with us. We actually left during intermission to do a bit more sightseeing and Tim took us down to see Ground Zero and then new WTC being built.Tim and I being rebels in the "No standing Zone". That's the new WTC.

We also walked down to the waterfront and enjoyed a nice sunset before heading back up to Risottoria's for dinner. The pizza and breadsticks were great and we were apparently very lucky to get a table in this popular, but small restaurant. Brice had a hankering for some canolis so we stopped at a bakery and picked some up to enjoy pre-show. Tim helped us grab a cab and we were off to Broadway.Brice and me at the waterfront. Tiny Lady Liberty back there.

The Lion King was a great show and we had high expectations since we'd heard from several people about it. I was impressed with the creativity of the costume designers in creating all of the animals--all kinds of things I never would have thought up myself.
Afterward we walked over to Grand Central Station to grab a train back to Brooklyn since we hadn't gotten there yet. The next morning we enjoyed some more great bagels before heading out. It was really nice to have such a short trip home, too.

I got home in time to attend my work Christmas party and gift exchange and Brice's oldest brother Brian arrived to visit. He and Brice hung out and when I got home I made dinner for us and we had a nice evening together. Brian hadn't been to visit us at our home before so that was nice.

About 4:30 AM I got a phone call: my sister-in-law was in labor and at the hospital! The next day was a pretty exciting one as I texted back and forth with Ashley and eventually just my brother. I got a text at 4:59 PM (EST) that she was pushing and my countdown began. The closer it got to two hours (a basic guideline I had gone by over the years) the more antsy I became. I (finally!) got a text at 7:05 PM (EST) that my nephew was there--arrived at 4:59 PM (Mountain time)--exactly two hours later. His name is Gabriel Benjamin and he was 8 lbs 7.3 oz. Ashley and GB were both just fine.

It's the most wonderful time of the year

2011-12-09T07:36:00.002-05:00

This is a re-post from last year. I've been thinking about this again this year and thought there might be someone who would benefit this year...

I've been giving Christmas a bit of extra thought this year. Every year I hear people trying to remind everyone about the true meaning of Christmas and berating the world for its consumerism and greediness. I guess I've never really felt that at Christmas. See, in general, I think Christians are a bit too hard on themselves and the rest of society. I hear Christians with young children trying to make sense out of the best way to communicate Christmas to their kids, sometimes giving different types of presents or questioning the introduction of Santa.

The thing is, I think it's totally awesome that the population at large participates in Christmas. We frequently remind our fellow Christians of "the reason for the season" and we know that's why we celebrate, but others do too. And basically, that's an open door for us. How great an opportunity that our holiday so central to our faith is publicized and promoted. Maybe instead of lamenting the loss of the religious aspect of Christmas to the secular world, we should rejoice in the opportunity it gives us to evangelize our fellow man.

Christians express frustration that they are unable to focus their faith during the season and parents stress about raising their children to understand Christmas properly. Well, let me share...

I grew up giving and receiving gifts on Christmas day. I grew up expecting Santa Claus on Christmas eve and watching Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. I also grew up reading an advent calendar daily during the month of December, attending a candelight service on Christmas eve, and finding at least one way to give to someone in the name of Christ each year. For anyone who wonders if you can meld the secular and religious traditions of Christmas, you can. My parents and family did, and they ended up with a minister and an ever-more faithful daughter.

I give gifts every year and not out of obligation, but a desire to give my family and friends something I carefully crafted, worked hard to find, or carefully chose. One year, I gave everyone a gift of a donation to a charity I selected specifically as something that person supported. The same feeling that went with that year is the same for more traditional gifts--a sense of thoughtfulness. Gift-giving does not have to be something you feel forced to do by the shopping industry. If it is for you, then don't do it. It's not for me.

Santa is also not the worst concept. I think the best defense I heard was on an old episode of 7th Heaven where Simon prayed for his younger sister Ruthie to have some way to believe in Santa Claus that year. He said she needs to believe in Santa, it's how she works her way up to the big stuff, like you. Include Santa or don't, but have a little faith in yourself that your child's belief in Santa will not be their downfall when you consider everything else you'll teach them.

While all of my ideas are good for me, I have come to realize in the past couple of years that maybe it's easier for me. You see, I think I finally understand that I have an above-average love of Christmas. And while it may just be coincidence, I say it's because I was born around Christmas. I really think there is something to this.

I have assumed my entire life that others love Christmas just as much as me. But the older I get, the more I realize that many people see it as simply an annual time of stress or disgust at the world, as mentioned above. But to me, it's such a time of renewal.

Winter has always been my season. For most of my life, I have preferred the cold. I love snow, I love sweaters, hats, gloves, hot chocolate. I think an extra-special thing about Christmas is that it is during a time of cold. The fact that we create such warmth and joy in the midst of all the cold and bleakness is a paradox that is quite beautiful to me.And Christmas carols--oh, how I love. I have a deep love for singing the most traditional songs. The words seem more simple and the praises more authentic. They fill me with hope, graciousness, and love. The First Noel regularly makes me teary-eyed, along with flawless renditions of O Holy Night (I refuse to sing this one personally since I do not have the voice to do it justice).

And finally, there is my Christmas "miracle". Every year, there is something, a moment, a person, an action, a statement overheard, that once again centers me in this "true meaning of Christmas".

I think more of us get it than we realize.

Making it look a lot like Christmas

2011-12-07T12:25:00.001-05:00

I really love getting my decorations up as early as possible, so I was glad that the first weekend in December was open. We invited Brice's brother up from Annapolis to join us. Keith arrived around lunchtime on Saturday and we had grilled cheese sandwiches. Then we headed out to a small Christmas tree farm owned by a co-worker of mine. We found a really great tree which is my favorite tree ever (and without any fancy tree-lot trimming) and had it freshly cut.

Keith picked out a tree for his apartment, too ;-)

The boys got the lights on the tree for me and then lights outside while I did most of the hanging of the ornaments. I also made some hot chocolate for us. For dinner, we took Keith to a barbecue place we discovered. Not NC barbecue or anything, but the best we can find here. They only have outdoor seating, so it was a little chilly, but the boys enjoyed a rack of ribs just fine. There was a beer tasting going on at a nearby liquor store so we headed over for that and it seemed a good time was had by all. (I don't drink beer so I made for a good designated driver. While I thought everything tasted bad, I think all beer tastes bad, so one shouldn't ask my opinion.)

When we got home we watched Home Alone and I made some chocolate chip cookies with Christmas M&Ms and cookies for us to enjoy. Yes, we do a good job of Christmas-ing here at our house :-)

The tree skirt I made the following week.

And as tradition follows, my favorite Christmas commercials to get you in the spirit:

Coke
My favorite

Lean your ear this way...

2011-12-07T08:04:00.000-05:00

It's no secret that I love my magazines. Every year there are suggestions of gifts, but I don't find them all that helpful. They read more as ads for products that are pretty or cute, but rarely functional or something a person might really want. If you're looking for a good gift for a person who prefers to be surprised with something just super neat, that's a good way to go. I've gotten some great gifts like that from people who know me really well (my best friends, my brother). But most people don't know us that well and while those vintage china napkin rings are super cute, will your sister use them enough? So here is my attempt at a gift-giving idea list for 2011:

iTunes gift card
Earbuds/headphones
Netflix subscription
Magazine subscription
Membership to a museum
A cool kitchen gadget (like a garlic press--something they'd love to have, but don't want to just get themselves)
CD, book, or movie
Cookbook
Perfume or cologne
A jewelry box or valet
A charging station
A game
Something for your car
Desk accessories
Servingware, platters

And for the older adult in your life, think consumables. Try food gifts, monthly wine clubs, those fruit arrangements, or flowers. Some older adults who really don't want "presents" would like a supply of batteries, flashlights, or new towels.

Just try to think of something it would be nice to have, but you are unlikely to spend the money on yourself.

A Cunningham Thanksgiving

2011-12-06T12:24:00.008-05:00

We spent Thanksgiving with my husband's family in Beaufort, NC. His mother's sister hosted the whole crowd at their home where she has hosted many times before.

Brice and I drove down to Richmond on Tuesday night and spent the night with his sister, her husband, and son. We spent most of our time the next day on preparations for the trip while we waited for our nephew to come home from school.

Amazingly enough, we managed to pack all five of us and our gear into the Expedition and leave that afternoon. (Just so we don't seem like a bunch of divas: the gear included a turkey fryer, lots of food and multiple coolers.) We took a nice scenic drive in an effort to avoid holiday traffic and really didn't have any problems.

We arrived for dinner Wednesday night (which we hoped would be good ;-) ), a lovely meal prepared by Brice's aunt of gumbo, salad, and bread. This was my first year helping with food and I had agreed to provide some of the desserts; so that night we had marshmallow brownies and haystacks. It was great to see everyone and it was my first time meeting my brother-in-law's girlfriend.

Thursday was a day of food prep mostly; I had pumpkin pies to assemble while my brother-in-law set out to save the day by taking over the making of one of our three turkeys. My other brother-in-law was frying the other two. The "grandchildren" played some games and generally just enjoyed one another's company. We enjoyed another fantastic Thanksgiving dinner that night.

Friday found me on the boat with Brice's parents, his brother and brother's girlfriend, his aunt, his sister, and of course, our fearless captain, his uncle (our host). We saw a great number of jellyfish in the water and were lucky enough to spot several dolphins as well! Another group went to do some shooting during the boat trip (Brice's youngest cousin is an accomplished hunter).

That night we enjoyed a fish fry along with homemade potato chips, macaroni and cheese, and s'mores cupcakes (by Brice's cousin). It was a great time around the fire pit in the backyard too where we roasted marshmallows--some for eating, some for sport :-).Saturday was a wildcard day for everyone. After the traditional family photo shoot (see below), a group took a boat ride to an island nearby, but Brice and stayed behind watching his alma mater play football, taking a nap, and a walk. I did some Christmas crafts that night before dinner with Brice's aunt, cousin, sister, and nephew. Everything turned out pretty well except for my angel that seemed to be a little more difficult to conquer. Having many more leftovers than we anticipated, we skipped the idea of a meal made by the "grandchildren" and kept eating what we already had. Turned out Brice's cousin and I really over-planned for desserts, too. Oh well--we learned for the next time.

My husband's family: his parents, brothers (plus one brother's girlfriend), us at the far right, and his sister standing with her husband and son.

Our crew of five headed out the next morning (the trip to Richmond was only four hours or so, but we were still at least 8 hours from home, depending on traffic). It was a quiet drive back to Richmond with a little bit of traffic at the end. Our trip from there had plenty of traffic with which to contend, but our moods were lifted with a well-placed Bojangles' (we don't have any of these within less than three hours of us anymore).

All in all, it was a successful Thanksgiving. We have spent three Thanksgivings of the last four with the Cunningham extended family and I must say, they have really figured out how to do it. I consider it a real blessing to be a part of a family that has been able to endure through the years still celebrating with so many people included. Even now as the "grandchildren" are grown adults, they each still make such an effort to attend and they all really look forward to it.

Grandma, with seven of her nine grandchildren.

2011-12-06T12:18:00.002-05:00

I apologize for Nearly-No-Post-November. Things got busy with craft projects I was working on and school projects and exams. But my class is over now and I have finished a lot of things up. So naturally I started some new stuff last night! However, my blogging should pick up again. Scroll down for today's post and our Christmas news post, also found above as a page with last year's news as well. Thanks for sticking with us!

Oh yarn!

2011-12-06T12:01:00.007-05:00

After reading one of my favorite blogs, Alicia's Homemaking, a month or so ago, I saw this awesome yarn wreath I wanted to make. It looked like one of those crafts that was definitely going to look good--not something that you could mess up if you followed instructions. Totally worth it. Find the instructions here.

First step, wrapping the entire wreath with yarn....
This is by far where you will spend most of your time on this project. It is easy, but wrapping does take a long time.

After that's complete, you get to make pretty felt flowers....
I added a couple more after deciding it was a little too bare. I had originally imagined just three flowers, but larger. I recommend that if you want all your flowers the same color, get more than one of those felt rectangles. I only bought one white and one green each.

You can make them in all kinds of colors, add things besides flowers, use multi-colored yarn--lots of options! (Alicia covered hers in burlap, which would cut down on time and give it a country look. A family member suggested wide ribbon to also save on time.) I gave mine to my husband's aunt as a hostess gift for Thanksgiving, so I did Christmas colors. I think they make a great gift.

Christmas News 2011

2011-11-28T20:22:00.003-05:00

We are so glad that you've paid a visit to our blog. Whether our Christmas card brought you here or you are a regular follower, we're excited to share some of what the year has brought us. We'll hit the highlights, but if you want more detail, just check out the links within to the archives. We welcome you to bookmark us or add us to your Google reader so you can see what's going on year-round. I have also found Facebook to be a great tool for keeping in touch (mostly) with the Daousts, and I welcome more friends from the Schultz, Cunningham, and Pridgen clans. I stay fairly active and will post pictures from time to time. As to the pictures on your card, from left to right they are Brice on the beach in The Bahamas, the two of us at his grandmother's birthday in April, and me, ziplining through the Costa Rican rainforest. And now, without further ado...

We started this year with lots of questions about where we would be headed when Brice finished his masters in mechanical engineering. Brice had several interviews and did a good bit of traveling. It was not until April that we knew we would be headed to Newark, Delaware.

In March, we took a week long trip to Costa Rica. Brice had become interested in the country years ago in Spanish class and his Spanish came in very handy. I felt much better being there with someone who spoke the language. We had a great time exploring the rainforest, enjoying the ocean, and seeing an active volcano. You haven't lived until you've rented a car in a foreign country.

Taking advantage of our transition time, I left my job in early May and we took a cruise to the Caribbean. We had a nice and relaxing time. I followed that up with a trip to Denver, Colorado to visit Brian and Ashley. I was greeted by the news of a niece or nephew on the way, due to arrive this Christmas! Our whole family will be together in Denver for Christmas--a first since 2006!

I returned home to Brice, busily packing up our Atlanta life. We both worked hard to get things together and started our trek northward. We stopped for a visit in Concord with our family and then a few days in Richmond.

We've enjoyed our time here in Newark. Brice is working for Siemens and doing a good bit of traveling. I am working in Student Health at the University of Delaware. I also started taking classes this fall in UD's online program. We will be moving to Germany near the end of the winter and we're very excited about it.

There have been lots of adventures you can read about such as visits to NY, day trips to Philly (we live about 40 minutes south), our trip to NC for a friend's wedding, a weekend in Lancaster, and most recently, our wonderful Thanksgiving with the Cunninghams. We really encourage you to read more posts and look at our pictures.

It has been a year of many good times, but with the loss of my uncle, Gary and Brice's uncle, Doug, we feel even more blessed to welcome a new family member this year. We would love for YOU to come visit us--here in Newark, or in Germany.

We hope that you will stay in touch with us this year, whether through our blog, Facebook, e-mail, or the old-fashioned telephone or snail mail. Thank you for continuing to be a part of our lives.

Merry Christmas,
Brice and Kelley

Updates

2011-11-20T23:28:00.000-05:00

In late October, we attended a dinner for newcomers at the church we have been attending. We met a few new people and spent some more time with the couple we had already met (they were on the team of members hosting). There were lots of young families and, unfortunately, not enough young couples in the newbie group. But it was consistent with our other experiences with the church; friendly and welcoming people. We signed up to participate in some ministries and enjoyed some great food. Since I came straight after work (I work directly across the street), I was very early and able to attend the evening prayer service.

My husband's parents came up to visit the first weekend in November. They stayed in Annapolis with Brice's brother on Friday and Saturday and then met up with us Sunday at an event called Punkin Chunkin' in Lower Slower Delaware. This is a very unique event which one might label as bit, ahem, of the sunburned cervical spine variety. Teams build either catapult or canon-type devices to slingshot or shoot a pumpkin as far as possible. The distances are measured by people riding four-wheelers/ATVs out in the field. It was an experience. This event is broadcast on the Discovery Channel annually on Thanksgiving. We spotted the hosts of the special, the Mythbusters trio, amongst the contestants.

The following weekend I made a trip to upstate New York to work on a quilt for my soon-to-be niece or nephew with my aunt. She had helped me pick out the fabrics and design over the summer and I had been working independently at home. I had my final exam coming up and traveling for Thanksgiving and the quilt needed to be ready for our trip to Denver at Christmas. I needed to get it done and Aunt Betty was the one to make that happen. It was a busy weekend where I learned the mechanics of making a binding cut on the bias (I couldn't tell you how now) and I spent a lot of time hunched over sewing and pinning, but we got it done. All but half the ties and the label, which I plan to finish on my own.

We will be heading to Beaufort, NC for Thanksgiving with my husband's mother's extended family this year. I expect it to be a fun trip as always :-)

Best friends

2011-11-04T07:34:00.001-04:00

We had a great time this year picking out pumpkins to carve. I have gotten a pumpkin the past couple of years, but we haven't carved. I'm not a huge fan of jack o' lanterns (or Halloween--don't hate it, just not into it), but thought it would be fun for us this year. We got out inspiration when my husband decided a tall, thinner pumpkin looked good while I was going for the rounder ones. Take a look at our carving fun...

And when we were done...
Pretty good, huh?

In other news, check out my post below about my first published work!

I'm published!

2011-10-18T15:15:00.003-04:00

I'd like to invite you to read my very first published article. It is located in an online magazine used by UD. However, here is your fair warning: this article should only be read if you are open-minded and respectful of beliefs regarding sexuality that may be different from your own. This article was written with the intention of meeting today's university student where he or she is and promoting healthy behaviors. The article is very different from the material you will normally find here at Over the Threshold. Since this blog is read by many traditional and conservative readers, if you think the article may offend you in any way, I encourage you to not read it.

Student Health 101 (This link will take you to the magazine. There will be sound from a video in the top right corner. Click on the arrow on the right side of the screen to advance to the next pages two times.)

Plain & simple

2011-10-17T17:30:00.005-04:00

We have just returned from a wonderful weekend together in Lancaster County, Pennsylvania. It's a short drive from us, but the hurricane and rainy weekends delayed the drip until this weekend.

After participating in a young adult movie night at our church, we got an early start and headed for Pennsylvania. There is this cool area called "the wedge" near us where we were still in Delaware, then about 20 or 30 seconds in Maryland and then in Pennsylvania. Ahh, the wonders of our small state--"the small wonder".

We had reserved scooters to rent for two hours when we first arrived. It was a great day for it, just a little bit too windy, but otherwise a beautiful day. We rode twenty-seven miles through Amish country farms, stopping at a dairy farm for our complementary ice cream. Lapp Dairy farm has wonderful ice cream--exceptionally creamy! The place was full of baby animals--lots of kittens and some larger cats very interested in our ice cream.

Afterward, we checked into our bed and breakfast. Brice had a nap while I read and then we went back out for a buggy ride and dinner at an Amish farm feast restaurant. The idea is that you sit with about twelve people total at your table and eat a set menu family-style with all your new friends. It's a different experience. We explored the local mall after dinner and walked off a little of our fried chicken.

Our Sunday plans were not as set in stone as Saturday. We had tossed around a few ideas of things to do and finally found some parks and "scenic drive" maps. We did a bit of hiking near the Susquehana and drove down the east side and up the west, stopping at a unique bar for some decent pulled-pork sandwiches. On a whim, we decided to head for Gettysburg. Again, the weather was great and the setting was perfect for walking around the area.
We had many, many beautiful views of fields, farms, barns, animals, rolling hills, and setting suns this weekend. Sunday night was wrapped up with a great dinner at a brewery.

Brice took Monday off of work so that we were able to take a tour of the Martin guitar factory in Nazareth, PA. It was an interesting tour, especially after seeing the "How it's made" episode a few weeks ago. Nice to see quality work being done in comfortable working conditions in America. Our final stop was Bojangles' in Reading, the most northern store in the United States and the closest one to us.

It was a great weekend, and we may return for some more ice cream or another scooter ride.

What we've been up to

2011-10-11T11:26:00.002-04:00

Well readers, when last you read we were apple-picking to kick off fall...

We had hoped to travel to the Amish country that weekend, but the forecast was nothing but rain. I'm not sure what it did there, but it was mostly just overcast here so I was a disappointed we missed our chance (again).

Brice's brother's birthday was the following Tuesday, so rather than wait until the next weekend, we decided to celebrate early. We met him in Baltimore and he picked a lovely restaurant in Little Italy for us after we strolled along the waterfront. After dinner we went in search of gelato, but found it a little more than we were willing to offer and went with Maggie Moo's instead.

The following weekend we went to King of Prussia mall (the largest in America in terms of leasable retail space). We finally got some good shopping done for Brice and marveled at the the greatest symbol of our American culture :-) The next day was mostly studying for me after church since I had my first test for my class on Tuesday. I felt the test went pretty well, but we still haven't gotten our grades yet.

Brice was traveling for work to Connecticut Tuesday through Thursday last week. Work is going pretty well for him and his thesis appears to even be the solution to a problem they've been having.

This past weekend we had our first social invitations. A couple we met at church invited Brice and me to golf and to a jewelry party, respectively. Brice had an early morning as the guys wanted to be done around the time our party was ending. We both had a good time and plan to get together with this couple more.

Sunday we finally went for a walk at our local park. It appears to be very new with lots of seedling-type trees, so very little shade. We saw lots of groundhogs though, and it became a bit of a game to spot them. On our way home we picked out some pumpkins. We have fun (but surprise!) plans for our carving, so I'll share that later...

I've mentioned our church-going a few times, but I thought I would elaborate. In August I finally decided to visit the Episcopal church across the street from where I work. A newsletter on their website was announcing a dinner for young adults that had already occurred the week before. I felt encouraged by this announcement though that there were actually young adults at this church. I went by myself the first week since Brice was visiting with his brother. The members were very friendly and I met the husband from the couple I just mentioned. He introduced himself right away and was very friendly and helpful with explaining various things about the church. He introduced me later to his wife and her friend. It's really the only church we've been to since. The priest learned our names quite quickly and we have found everyone to be very friendly and welcoming. This Friday we are attending a young adult movie night so hopefully we will meet more people.

I have learned a lot about what is important to someone new at church, so I hope that I will remember all of this in my own long-term church(es) in the future.

My style icon

2011-10-07T07:52:00.004-04:00

I'm never really sure how to define my "style". I know it's not really necessary, but sometimes people ask for your "style icon" in personality quizzes and such. So I took this quiz and I got the lovely Rachel Bilson, so I was happy with that.

So then I did that thing where you go back and change the answers on the questions you were ambivalent about and I got Emma Watson, which I think could be fairly accurate at times, too.

And on occasions where I need to dress up, sometimes I channel my inner "Princess Kate".

What about you? Do you have a style icon?

Fall adventures

2011-09-30T08:00:00.001-04:00

Me, with Eleanor Roosevelt at the FDR memorial in Washington, D. C.

My husband and me, claiming our state at the WWII memorial.

My husband's joke-induced smile in front of the capitol. (it's necessary sometimes :-) )

A perfect apple in a Maryland orchard.

My husband is always in charge of "quality control".

Selecting a "me"-sized apple :-)

Gigantic mushroom in the orchard!

Our "pet goose", Henry.

My husband with his newest toy.

Ketchup

2011-09-20T09:43:00.004-04:00

First, let me apologize for the "blogging bursts" that have become the norm around here. I'm really going to try to get a better blogging schedule--for me, mostly. On to recent events...

We were warned we were in the path of hurricane Irene last month, so I joined in with the preparations. Like any good Girl Scout, I never want to be the one who isn't prepared. So without a lot of fanfare, I did fill the bathtub, got some extra water, and inventoried the fridge and freezer. While I didn't expect to have real damage, I was surprised we didn't lose power. While there was a lot of damage and devastation in other places, everything was fine in our area and we didn't see any damage within our radius of home and work. We even went for a walk that afternoon.

Since we moved here we have been planning weekend trips to nearby interesting cities. We decided to make our trip to Washington, D. C. for the weekend. My uncle lives in the area and we had talked about staying with him, but he ended up stranded in upstate New York after his week long visit. (The Thruway had been shut down due to hurricane issues.) So we ended up giving Brice's brother Keith in Annapolis a call and he was good enough to put us up for the weekend. We did the typical monuments and museums on Saturday and met up with my uncle in the afternoon. He treated us to a nice dinner at popular hamburger place. On Sunday we took a spin through the art museum and then went to a Nationals game. The three of us put together a nice spaghetti dinner and relaxed after a long weekend.

The next weekend found us at Chick-fil-a (our favorite spot for free food!) enjoying a free breakfast. I needed some time to catch up on studying, so I did that while Brice went to the driving range on his own. We went to the Newark Film Festival in the afternoon and saw Midnight in Paris. I enjoyed it a bit more than Brice, but I was glad we got the chance to see it. On Sunday we got a visit from Aunt Betty and Uncle Pat. They were on their way back to New York from a wedding in North Carolina and stayed at a hotel in Newark. After settling on Mexican for dinner, we gave them a tour of our place and then brought them to the UDairy Creamery at the university. It's a nice little spot and if you visit us, you'll get to go too :-)

This past weekend we decided to go apple-picking at a highly-publicized orchard. Brice felt they had "Disney-ified" the experience, but we still had fun picking and being rebellious by exploring other parts of the orchard. We got lunch from Subway and headed to the park for a picnic and reading. The day was overcast and windy and the park has few trees, so it wasn't as pleasant as we had imagined. We left a little early, but still had a good time. After church on Sunday we went to the mall and a music shop. Brice is shopping for an electric guitar. Playing with the brand new one made the decision between used and new much harder :-)

Thanks for sticking with us, readers. More to come...

Review: The Girls from Ames

2011-08-28T17:07:00.005-04:00

I just finished this book by Jeffrey Zaslow. I am fairly certain that I gleaned the title from some type of book recommendation section in Real Simple or Good Housekeeping.

I had very little knowledge of the book before I began and was surprised to realize that this was not fiction and it was not really a story. The author writes for the "hearts" of the readers of the Wall Street Journal and felt compelled to take on the project this particular book must have been. He had received a letter from a woman who, like many others in his writing audience, wanted to share their personal experiences with friendship. Years later, he returned to her letter and developed the book.

I have compared the book to a long magazine interview with a large group of women. The book highlights many of the women for entire chapters, giving their emotional life story, while some of the women have only a fraction of coverage. It is highly anecdotal and it is not chronological.

I am amazed that a man got himself into this mess. I think he did a very good job of relating the numerous characters with enough detail that I did not mix them up and by the end felt like I pretty much could tell someone else about them.

I must admit, however, I came very close to not finishing somewhere in the second chapter. I was somewhat turned off by the mention of these girls being exclusive and very turned off later on when more elaboration was given to a specific incidence of utter cruelty. I commented to a friend that perhaps what made me take more issue was knowing that these were real people. Also, sometimes it is easier to admire fictional characters because they can be molded into "just-right" people, while real individuals have flaws. In the end, I came to realize that while I disapproved of this group in some ways, their ability to recover from these flaws and to maintain their friendship was redeeming.

I didn't find many similarities between their friendships and my long-term friendships (largely because from what I could tell, their group would have been the type that my group was not particularly fond of), I did identify with one idea: that the friendships they (and I) make as an adult are not as deep and also not necessary to be as deep. We have these friends who will always be there. There may not be contact as frequently and they might not know the day to day details, but they are an ever-present influence in our lives, the friends we will always count on, the ones with whom wounds will always heal and histories are sacred.

Things I'm lovin'

2011-08-26T07:00:00.000-04:00

A few things I have come across lately and would like to share...

1. cozy blue etsy shop: Really fun products made by a Carolina girl!

2. Sodium Girl: A blog by a fellow lupus gal on cutting out sodium to save her kidneys. She managed to even stop dialysis!

3. Cynthia Duff: Saw her work at an art festival in Denver, CO. I'm a huge fan of the Here's Cheers paintings--they're so fun!

4. Yoga Month: September is Yoga Month! Check out this website to see if there is studio in your area offering your first week free!

Review: The Year of Living Biblically

2011-08-25T08:00:00.003-04:00

This review is a little delayed, but better late than never.

The Year of Living Biblically is A. J. Jacobs' story of his attempt to follow the Bible as literally as possible. He is a secular Jew, describing himself as being "as Jewish as the Olive Garden is an Italian restaurant." He begins by reading the entire Bible and writing down every rule he can find. Seventy-two pages worth. He decides to be fair, he will devote a proportionally larger part of the year to the Old Testament rules and a smaller part to the New Testament, since they can be conflicting. I have recommended the book to many people (before I ever even finished) saying that I felt it was a multi-faceted book. First, Jacobs is a witty guy and he keeps you laughing throughout. Second, it was educational. He consults several experts frequently during the journey to explain strange laws. As the reader, you get the benefit of expert theological and historical context without having to read a long and boring book. Just snippets here and there within his humorous and identifiable story. I learned about different religious sects that I knew very little about before and have a new understanding of Old Testament laws. Lastly, I felt the book was helpful to me spiritually. Jacobs reflects often on his own developing spirituality which caused me to reflect on my own. Even though I didn't take the same journey, it was still beneficial to me.

I stumbled upon this book while just browsing the library. I don't think I was even looking for anything religious (how uncharacteristic of me). Originally, I planned to pick it up after finishing my forced reading of Little Women. But I decided to just see how it started--and I couldn't put it down. I guess I would credit the book with getting me back into reading and helping me discover what kinds of books I liked as an adult.

I would go so far as to recommend this book for a Bible study--if you have the kind of Bible study where people are open to things besides Max Lucado books and enjoy finding the spiritual benefit in the non-spiritually intended media of the world.

My only real criticism is this: A. J., you have some typos in there. And I mention this only because I know from your own admission that you Google yourself and perhaps you will find my review and decide to respond. :-) Typos in the published and supposedly edited work are one of my pet peeves. And, you took a few too many shortcuts. I wouldn't do it myself, but I expect a hard-core attitude. Just kidding.

Summer photo contest

2011-08-22T16:36:00.000-04:00

Check out my photo contest submissions green , blue, yellow, orange, pink, and purple.

Day by day

2011-08-22T16:14:00.002-04:00

This past week at home has been marvelous--basically since in the last three weeks it's the most consecutive days I have been home!

We attended a beginner yoga class together Monday night. I got a Groupon for five classes and had been to one beginner class, one Pilates class, and one all-level class. I thought it would be fun to go together, so that's how we used the last two. I'm not sure Brice will be a regular, but he enjoyed it and we may do it together again. I am pretty excited about it and I think I could really get into it. The only downside of course is that I have to pay full-price now and it's kind of a drive. But a few times a month should be fine.

We also went to the driving range together. I'm not really inspired to become a golfer, but we've done this together before and I enjoy it. It might become a more regular occurence, though I have been told I should probably slow down my number of drives per hour. Our jumbo bucket of balls did not last very long.

We visited the mall for new clothes for Brice--it always seems everything needs to be replaced at the same time. Not much luck, but we did find one pair of pants, which is a small victory.

We opted to not travel for the weekend since I was kind of burnt out. Brice met his brother Keith for golf on Saturday and then brought him home for dinner and to spend the night.

I visited a new church yesterday and I'm pretty excited about it. A young couple approached me and everyone was very friendly. And, they have a yoga class twice a week :-) We'll try to go back next week.

So it's been a quiet week, but still fun. I have one day of work this week to re-acclimate after so much time away and then my regular schedule starts next week. We might try a trip to Cape May this weekend or the Amish country. Sometime in the later summer or early fall we plan to visit DC and NYC.

As always, if you're passing through on I-95, stop by!

Carolina in my...person

2011-08-22T15:51:00.002-04:00

After our visit to Philly, we heard that Brice's uncle had passed away. We began trying to work out a way for to attend the funeral. We were already planning to be in NC for a wedding the following weekend, so it was a matter of changing my flight. It all managed to work out and I flew into Raleigh Monday night and stayed with my friend, Heather. Brice's cousin, Lynn, picked me up in the morning and we rode to Asheboro together. It was nice to see everyone, despite the circumstances, and get a chance to speak with Brice's cousins who I had only met briefly at our wedding.

I rode back to Concord with Brice's parents and stayed with my parents for the next two nights. The change of plans also afforded me the opportunity to have dinner with Jessica before she moved to Birmingham for her new internship.

My parents and I left Thursday morning for New Bern for my good friend Matt's wedding. My brother was the officiant and I read Sonnet 116 at the ceremony. Matt's mom asked my dad to take pictures with her camera and my mom's job was to be her emotional support. (First son to get married.) The rehearsal and dinner were great. Brice arrived the next afternoon before the wedding and the whole event went smoothly. We enjoyed a great reception with great company and food and dancing.

Ashley's mom planned a baby shower for the following day since it was the only chance for them to be on the east coast. Brice spent some time with his friends in Raleigh while we enjoyed a lavish spread at the shower. I got to see my cousin, Josee, and her kids and Aunt Judith and Uncle Paul. They toted me to Josee's after the shower where Josee continued to Heather's in Raleigh with me. Heather, Stephen, and I met Brice and his friends Andy and Danny and Danny's girlfriend for dinner. We ate at Pie Birds, a locale with sweet and savory pies. Mine was a delicious goat cheese and tomato that I think I will try to replicate. Then we all headed to a local pub to watch some of the Panthers game.

Heather and Stephen took us to Bojangles' for a long-awaited meal for me (Brice's second in 24 hours!) before dropping us off at the airport. It was a great visit, but I was glad to be home a while.

Philly

2011-08-22T15:38:00.003-04:00

The Sunday after my return from NY and Brice's return from Germany found us in Philly. We'd intended to go a couple of weeks before but it didn't work out. So we happened to have a chance to go on the first Sunday of the month, which is "pay what you wish" day at the art museum. The steps in front of the art museum are the "Rocky steps". There is a Rocky statue in front where we never saw fewer than ten people taking pictures and there is always at least one person running up the steps, then turning with their arms up, Rocky-style. Yes, we are a pop-culture culture.

We explored the museum and then set out for Reading Terminal Market, the spot I'd planned for lunch. We were about five blocks on our way when we decided that the humidity was too much. We turned back for the Franklin Institute, our next planned visit, and indulged ourselves with one of those over-priced museum cafeteria lunches. The Franklin Institute was impressive and I recommend it if you have kids, or you enjoy pretending you are one. We hit most of the exhibits and saw a planetarium show and the visiting exhibit, Mummies.

I was a little disappointed with Mummies. They were talking it up with questions like, what can we learn about them? What can they tell us about history? How can they help us today? But after seeing the exhibit, I didn't really get many answers to those questions and didn't see much of a reason to study them other than pure curiosity (which I possess as well, so not a slight). Also, many of the mummies had info plaques that basically said, We don't know hardly anything about this mummy--it's under study. I kept thinking, well maybe you should have held off on the exhibit for a few years then. Another thing that stuck me was that there seemed to be concern for modesty with the Caucasian mummies (drapes across their middles or full costumes), while mummies from other races were just exposed. I left a comment asking about this.

If the exhibit comes to your town and you see it, let me know what you think.

Family visits

2011-08-22T15:05:00.000-04:00

I know this is long overdue, but here is my attempt to recap all of the wonderful NY visits this summer...

Not too long after starting work, Brice was sent to Germany during the last week of June. I decided to use this opportunity to visit my family in upstate New York, now only about five hours away! I left on Friday the 24th after procuring a desk off of craigslist and hauling it piece by piece up from the car to our third-floor apartment. (This blog post comes to you now from said desk, which I am, obviously, very proud of)

Arriving only slightly later than I hoped, I had a nice evening with my grandmother and then lunch the next day with my cousin Katie who stopped by on her way to a wedding. Mimi and I visited her brother and his wife, my Uncle John & Aunt Carm, and had a wonderful meal with them. Aunt Carm is a wonderful cook. I took Mimi to church on Sunday and then to get gas and to Walmart. Wary of the afternoon's weather, we decided to chance it and drive up to Saratoga to where she and Papa lived when they were first married. We walked around a little and Mimi got her first taste of gelato.

I got to see my Aunt Betty (my mom's sister) Monday afternoon when she returned from the Cape. She is glowing 24/7 now that she is retired :-) I left around seven for Coxsackie to see my Aunt Sue (my dad's sister). We had a late dinner at local restaurant and then a nice chat over wine back at her house. She lost her husband in April after a relatively short period of illness. Brice and I were unable to make the memorial service, so I was glad to be able to spend some time with her. We went to a water aerobics class in the morning and then did some kayaking. It was my first time and I loved it. Now all I need is a lake house, kayak, and paddle... I left in the late afternoon to head back to Albany. I met Mimi at my Aunt Betty & Uncle Pat's house for a delicious dinner of Cornell chicken, burgers, salads, and deviled eggs.

I spent some time again with Aunt Carm the next day for help with my knitting. I'm no big knitter and I have no idea how to start or finish, but I can do the part in between and make you a nice scarf. She taught me how to finish and even gave me some yarn in the hope that maybe I could make something besides a scarf :-) Aunt Betty and I went on a shopping expedition in search of an IKEA that turned out to not exist, but we went on to hit a Macy's, Talbots, and oh yeah, an ice cream stand. (The Schultz family feels most occasions call for ice cream.)

On my last night Mimi offered to treat me to dinner and I picked UNO's--this sounded like a good idea to Uncle Pat, so he and Aunt Betty joined us. All in all, a very nice visit.

A couple of weeks later, I returned to "God's country". Brice was again out of town for the week (this time in NY), but it was my second week of orientation. I drove up to Poughkeepsie on Friday and picked him up from the train station and we drove the rest of the way together to Aunt Betty and Uncle Pat's. They treated us to a great pizza dinner and then we figured that what this night needed was...yes, ice cream. They took us to a great spot they'd taken us before with outdoor seating and live music.

The main event was on Saturday. My Aunt Sue had organized a memorial barbecue fundraiser for the Epilepsy Foundation for which my uncle had been a board member. My parents were there already from their summer visit and we got to see two of my cousins (Katrina and Timmy), my Aunt Judith and Uncle Paul, and lots of other great aunts and uncles and my dad's cousins. We tried to stay in the shade or water as much as possible since it was unbelievably hot. Disappointingly, the pool water wasn't as refreshing as I would have liked and apparently the lake was warmer. I got to kayak twice, once with my cousin Katrina to bring the kayaks from the marina to the beach, and once with Brice and Tim. It was a long day, so we headed home and went to bed early.

Sunday was my mom's birthday, so her wonderful sister and brother-in-law hosted a huge Irish breakfast. They bought all the meats at an Irish grocery store at the Cape and we had boiling bacon, black and white pudding, bangers, tomatoes, eggs, and muffins. It was quite an impressive spread. We all headed home shortly after.

I got my last visit of the summer the first week in August. Brice was off to Germany again, so I was off to NY. I spent my first night with Aunt Sue to accompany her to an appointment in the morning. She treated me to dinner at a local Italian place where I had a fantastic burger and we split one of those chocolate cakes with the liquid chocolate inside--you know what I'm talking about. Just try to not think about it. We happened to bump into her (and my dad's--funny how that works) cousin. A funny experience for me, as I told her I have only ever seen family on purpose. After her appointment in the morning, she treated me to breakfast at Friendly's. We visited a bit more back at her house and had lunch before I headed out.

I had a nice dinner with Mimi and visited with Aunt Betty and Uncle Pat. I asked Aunt Betty to give me a hand with picking out fabric and designing the quilt I am making for our niece- or nephew-to-be. She invited me over the next day to look at her "stash" and then we brainstormed and headed out to a fabric store. I can't reveal any details since it's a surprise, but I'll post pictures when the time comes. That night she and Uncle Pat treated me to a concert at a local historical home. They have a kind of Wednesday night concert series with different cultural music. It was Irish music night and German food night. I met some friends of Uncle Pat's and had a very nice time. The bonus was that James Taylor was in the crowd enjoying the same concert as me. No one else was bugging him so I figured I'd leave him alone too, so no pictures or autographs.

Since I hadn't been able to see my Aunt Janet (my mom's other sister) or my cousins on my previous visits, I'd set aside Thursday for them. I headed out Thursday morning with excitement. About an hour later, it was like someone let the air out of my tires. Because someone had. (Come on folks, that was funny.) My right rear tire made a distinctive tha-thump tha-thump and I knew I had a flat. I called my Aunt Janet who said she could come out with my cousin Jimmy and we could change it together or call AAA. I told her I'd try Aunt Betty, who was closer at that point and see if she could call AAA. Her phone was busy so I thought I'd give it five minutes, when I hear a voice behind me ask, "You have a spare?" And there, like angels from heaven were two strapping twenty-something men in a red pick-up truck, faded jeans, work boots, plaid shirts, and baseball caps. The men they say live for this. They went right to work and changed the tire in about ten minutes. As I assumed, they wouldn't take anything for their time, but I told all the men in my life this: If you see a woman stranded, stop and help her. It could be those guys wife, sister, mother, or cousin. As I told Jimmy, even if you've never changed a tire, your being there will be helpful.

And then I was off again. I got to spend time with Aunt Janet and three of my cousins, Katie, Hannah, and Jimmy and then I went with Katie to drop Hannah off at work. I went for a walk with Jimmy and his goats when we got back, spent some time with Stephen when he got home, and had a long chat with Katie when she got home again. Aunt Janet took me to her mechanic who plugged my tire and didn't charge me a thing. We all had a great dinner of chili and cornbread and a fantastic homemade blueberry pie. (My aunt is a great cook who does so effortlessly.)

I left for home the next morning and had an evening alone until Brice got back the next day. They were great visits and I hope to get up once again in the fall. It's amazing to me how close they are now. The best part about Delaware, by far.

A small cup of coffee

2011-08-19T08:57:00.004-04:00

I know it really has been a long time since I've done coffee and a loooong time since I posted any updates on what we've been up to this summer. I shouldn't make any excuses since I'm not working, but I have been traveling a lot.

Since living in Delaware this summer I've had three trips to NY to visit my family. I spent all of last week in NC for my husband's uncle's funeral and then a wedding over the weekend. I've also been doing a lot of reading (see book review/essay below on Nickel and Dimed if you have time--I'd really love your thoughts) and I'll be posting some more reviews of books very soon. I'm also starting to work on a Christening quilt for our new niece or nephew (mom is Ashley from sidetracked) due in December. This is my first attempt at quilting in a serious way (insert nervous grin here).

More thorough chronicling of our summer adventures to come soon for the family readers who may enjoy, along with those book reviews. Can't post any quilting pictures though--it's a surprise!

Review: Nickel & Dimed

2011-08-18T11:55:00.009-04:00

I just finished reading this book. (And by just I mean, I read the last few pages sitting here in front of the computer taking notes on what I was going to say just seconds before typing the first sentence of the post.)

Some background...Author Barbara Ehrenreich decides to embark on a social experiment circa 2000 in an attempt to see if she can make ends meet as a low-wage worker. She spends a short amount of time in a few different locations (Key West, Maine, Minneapolis) with jobs as a waitress, maid, and Walmart associate. She details her woes of the job search, the apartment search, the second job search, the second apartment search, and difficulties with food. In the end, she pretty much proves her point: as the circumstances of the average low-wage worker lie, it is an impossible cycle of poverty to break.

While I don't think I care much for her as a writer (or her personality for that matter--how many times do we need to hear about your Ph. D?), I do agree it is a valuable read for most of America. In 2003, this book was the summer reading for the university my good friend was about to attend. My mom, always looking for an excuse to read something the kids are, decided she'd read it and discuss it with my friend. The friend found the author annoying (disliking her attitude and episode of pot-smoking), but my mom argued, and still does, that you must look past that. Which I did my best to do as I read and tried to learn.

However, I learned more from approximately four or five months of working at an assisted living center about the plight of a low-wage worker than I did from her book. Yes, the book gave me more statistics, but I had the concept already.

During two of my college summers, I decided to work at an assisted living home, just down the road from my parents. I had my CNA (nurse aide certification) and I planned to be a nurse (I now am). In order to gain experience and keep my certification active, I decided to work at this facility thinking it would be easier on me physically. My starting wage was $7.

Now for me, this was just a summer job. The first time I only worked weekends and I drove there in the car my parents bought with a nice discount from my grandfather. I went home to a large house in a safe neighborhood where my meals were provided free of cost, my rent was free, and the neighbors were quiet. I had no children to come home and take care of and every cent of what I made was mine to keep.

My job at the assisted living home was extremely valuable. I gained career experience. I gained insight into lives of women I would never have known. I worked in an undesirable job, something I'd had on my life's to-do list. However far I may go, I will always have the first hand knowledge of what is going on in the lives of those earning the lower wage. Ehrenreich points out that most college students no longer get that experience anymore in favor of internships. (A future post-degree employer is far more impressed with your internship at Ernst & Young than your summer as a Wendy's hamburger flipper.)

Nearly every other woman I worked with "stayed" somewhere. This is what they called where they lived. Because when you live a life of low-wages and uncertainty, your place of residence is just that transient. Each of them stayed with either a boyfriend of their mother. Each of them had at least one child (whose father was not the man with whom they were living--Ehrenreich does address that being alone and childless made her experiment much easier, and therefore less life-like). My life was so vastly different from these women and I knew it. I worked one weekend with a girl who said she hadn't eaten since Tuesday--when her boyfriend and father of her one month old left. Her sister wouldn't be able to watch the baby and she had no one else. How would she ever be able to work? Maybe if she changed shifts... I offered my phone number if she ever needed anything, but I never saw her again and when I went back to visit, no one knew where she was.

Regarding Ehrenreich's point about wages, I saw this discrepancy in a very real way. The very same summer I was working, a friend was working a job making (I can't remember exactly) about twice what I was making. She was filing papers in an office. I was leading Alzheimer's patients to the bathroom, prying poop-filled diapers out of their hands, cleaning urine off the floor, and struggling to bathe men who were most distracted by themselves once their pants were off. I chose my job and it was certainly more appropriate for me to be doing than filing papers. It was simply the wage discrepancy I saw and the fact that a job so much less physically demanding and paying so much more would never be available to the women with whom I worked.

My friend's father was a VP at the company where she worked. My friend was attending a prestigious university, my friend had professional clothes to wear. Which brings me to my next point: circumstances. I would never be where I am today if I hadn't been born into such good circumstances. Let's talk about transportation. I mentioned before about driving my car that I didn't buy. This was something Ehrenreich did point out: she rented a car everywhere she went. When I got married I was financially on my own for the very first time. My husband and I had one car. A car his parents had bought. I frequently think about those who must rely on public transportation. Every time I went to the grocery store in Atlanta I saw dozens of people waiting for the bus with groceries, or waiting to be picked up by a friend or a cab they'd had to splurge on. I saw people using the bus I was on (simply to visit my boyfriend in college) to get to work. A bus that was regularly late. When we got married, we both had college educations. That our parents had bought. I had a nursing license that would afford me good job. He had a degree and experience that got him into a graduate program that paid him to go to school. We had monetary gifts from family and friends. Circumstances are hard. Rising from them is hard. I think. I've never had to do it.

While my job as a nurse in a hospital was certainly far better pay, it's not without its similarities to the low-wage job. In fact, many hospital employees are the low-wage worker. Our techs on the floor often had struggles. I've seen the same situation in the hospital that Ehrenreich describes in the book for why low-wage workers do not leave for higher-paying jobs: how will they get to work? A co-worker with a car drives them here. It's close enough to take a bus, etc. They will need to start over, learn all new rules, make all new friends. Perhaps buy all new uniforms. Maybe take a cut in pay from what they have worked up to here.

Ehrenreich spends most of her evaluation on the discrepancy between wage and rent or affordable housing. She does spend some time on food, but not much. From the information she cites, there is not as much of a discrepancy. But let's talk about that for a minute. She mentions going to some form of social assistance and the process taking hours on the phone and a trip to an agency with a lot of questions. She finally receives a bag full of what I think must have been a mis-directed bag from the ladies at my church for a college student: sugary cereals, barbecue sauce, bags of candy, hamburger buns (no meat), Rice Krispies Treats, etc....you get the idea. Empty calories out the wazoo. We know that eating poorly is cheaper. I saw dozens of carts on food stamps day at the Walmart in Atlanta full of cheap, processed foods. The patrons were also overweight--but what are they going to do? Obesity leads to poor health, no healthcare.... Problems, problems...

I have often felt guilt for shopping at Walmart or loving Disney World (no housing accesible to anyone who works there anywhere near the park), but Ehrenreich's quote puts it well: "When someone works for less pay than she can live on--when, for example, she goes hungry so that you can eat more cheaply and conveniently--than she has made a great sacrifice for you, she has made you a gift of some part of her abilities, her health, and her life."

I don't have the solution. I am too young and inexperienced to claim that I do. But I'll keep doing what I can, and that includes writing something that might make us think a bit more.

I was old once

2011-08-01T00:04:00.002-04:00

Not sure if you ever knew, but once upon a time I was old. I couldn't get the tops off the bottles. I lost my balance trying to swing one foot over the side of the tub into the shower. I looked for the wheelchair dips in the sidewalk to avoid another step down. I needed that railing you were blocking to lean on just to get down the stairs. I limped every day and I popped pills constantly. I needed to lean on the shopping cart to get through the store. I was old once.

I had to ask for help to get the gas cap off the car and learned to never swipe the card before taking the cap off, just in case no one could help and I'd have to come back another time. I had to be sure I was home no more than fourteen hours after my day started, or else I'd never be able to get ready for bed before my fingers stopped working. I needed help sometimes just to get dressed. I learned how to button and zip and snap in different ways. I said no to stylish shoes in favor of supportive, even though they didn't stop the limp.

I was old once. But not anymore. But I still remember. It's not something you forget. When you look at me now and laugh and say, oh you can do that, you're young! I laugh inside and think, yes, I am now. For now. When you talk about your aches and pains and tell me someday I'll understand, you don't realize I already do, and that I may have them again much sooner than you know. When you wonder aloud why that seemingly healthy person needs that disabled parking spot, I know that their suffering may not be visible to you. I laugh inside at your assumptions about my abilities based on my age.

I am young now. But I am wiser, too. And I know I will be old again. Perhaps I will be better at it the next time. I am certainly better at being young now. Maybe you will be too.

Kyria Blog: Questioning Dinner

2011-07-17T16:02:00.000-04:00

Kyria Blog: Questioning Dinner

WWJD

2011-07-15T07:17:00.001-04:00

About ten to fifteen years ago this acronym was all the rage in Christian youth circles. What would Jesus do? Kids my age wore these woven bracelets in their favorite colors and exchanged them with friends (that’s how I got mine—thanks, Heather!). People even came up with different meanings for the acronym, Walk with Jesus daily, and backwards, Devils just won’t win.

I prefer the original sentiment, especially in the past few months. There are lots of current events going on, secularly and in the religious arena that incite a good amount of debate. A lot of more conservative followers turn to the Bible to see what it says literally; a lot of more liberal followers try to simply follow their hearts in their interpretation of what a passage might have meant in that time and convert it to a more contemporary thought. But perhaps what we should be doing is asking simply, what would Jesus do?

It is human nature to want answers to be cut and dry. Anyone who tells you they enjoy the unanswered question might be telling you the truth, but that is a learned behavior. It can be easier for us to search for black and white answers to difficult questions. I’m not always sure that is what God intends. (Disclaimer: No statements made throughout this writing should be construed that the author has any definite knowledge of God’s intentions.)

The more thought and study I give to the life of Jesus, the more I realize that, shockingly enough, Christians don’t always put enough emphasis on Him. We are given the Bible, with many writings teaching us what is right or wrong and we love to read it and quote it. Later on, we’re given God—in the flesh! Jesus died—we talk about this all the time, how Jesus died for us. But let us not forget that Jesus lived for us as well! He showed us how to live. So maybe, I’m thinking anyway, that the answers we search for to the difficult questions should be found by starting with what Jesus would do.

Now I realize that trying to figure out in our Christian communities what Jesus would have done in our contemporary situations might be a little more difficult than selecting an agreeable passage from the Bible, but Jesus told us things wouldn’t be easy. But that’s another post altogether…

Her favorite color was green/Becky's song

2011-07-13T11:13:00.002-04:00

David M. Bailey

Her favorite color was green
That's about all that I know
Except she knew the Lord Loved her -
her Bible told her so.

She swam in an ocean of laughter
She danced in a desert of grace
The way she loved those around her
Was written all over her face

I was there the morning she left us
I heard every tear that was shed
I wanted to ask God the reason
But I asked him what now instead

What now, God would you have us say?
What now, God would you have us do?
Wasn't it clear she was faithful?
Wasn't that enough for you?

God said, how could you ask such a question? Surely the answer is clear?
Do I have to paint you a picture?
Is it not enough I am here?

I said God, that's not what I meant
But she was just too young to die
God said I know what you mean - Remember I watched my son cry
I said yes, but at least your boy is with you
God said right, and now so is she
I set her a place at my table
and man, you should see that girl eat

In fact, I wish you could see her smiling
then you'd know she feels right at home
She's been telling the angels about you
Just so you won't feel alone

Her favorite color was green
That's my favorite too
She's already sliding down rainbows
Right between yellow and blue

What's new

2011-07-10T19:26:00.004-04:00

Two weeks ago Brice took off for his first trip to Germany with work. I decided to spend some time in NY with my family while he was gone. He went off to work in the morning and I went to get a background check for my new license. I ended up going check out and buy a desk from an add on Craigslist, so I now have my own computer back :-) After taking the thing apart in the heat (with a man who reminded me so much of my late grandfather--appropriate since he was the one relative I would not get to see on my trip) and then lugging it piece by piece to the car and piece by piece up the two flights of stairs, Brice came just in the nick of time to get the last piece I figured I'd just have to take with me to NY. So we did get to see each other before we left.

I made the drive up to (upstate) NY fairly easily. Pretty amazing that it's only five hours for me now. As a kid, it was a sixteen hour trip, so it's tough for me to believe I live that close. I had a nice visit with my grandmother and got to see my cousin for a couple of hours while she was passing through on her way to a wedding. My aunt (Mom's sister) and uncle had us over for dinner and I got down to see my aunt (Dad's sister) for a night. She introduced me to water aerobics and kayaking. I think I will need to have a lake and a kayak now :-) My aunt and I did some shopping and got out to Uno's for some amazing pizza with my uncle and grandmother. I'm so glad I've really only missed one summer of getting up there, even since being married.

Brice had a good time in Germany, but more fun during the not-working times. But isn't that always the story? He saw the BMW plant, a concentration camp, and had a drive along Romantic Road.

We made kind of a fun summer dinner after an afternoon by the pool on Sunday. There is a fruit and vegetable stand nearby, so we went to get some corn and ended up with a bit of extra fresh fruit as well. I made the buns again, for hotdogs, and here are my pictures this time:

We spent the 4th in nearby Philly. The original idea was that we would see the concert and fireworks. After some careful thinking, we realized that would keep us out too late for my first day of work and we had no idea how long it would take with whatever traffic there would likely be. We ended up parking, getting cheesesteaks at one of the most famous places, going to the all-you-can-eat ice cream festival, seeing the Liberty Bell and walking about eight miles in the process. Though it was still early when we left, we were pretty tired at that point.

I started my job this week at Student Health. Things have been held up a little because of a delay with my license, but I've been enjoying it so far. I won't start officially until August, but it's nice to get started with orientation.

And for anyone else interested, here is the link to pictures of our new place.

Thanks for inviting me...

2011-07-08T08:15:00.007-04:00

Monday is our two year wedding anniversary. I told my husband the other day while we were talking about our new home, Thanks for inviting me. He said, Is that what marriage is? I think so, I said.

Then and now:

In the kitchen

2011-07-01T19:33:00.000-04:00

I absolutely love my new kitchen. Our old kitchen was cramped and poorly designed. I felt like I couldn't put anything where it made sense. Our kitchen before that was better, but I still often couldn't store things in places that made sense.

The day we moved in was the first time I saw the apartment. (My husband selected this apartment on his own. I had never even been to Delaware before the day we moved here.)
I was reluctant to be excited about it at first, not wanting to get ahead of myself since I wasn't sure how all of our belongings would fit into it. But as I found that I could put things in places that were intuitive, my excitement grew.

My favorite part is my chopping/slicing/dicing station. The surface at left houses knives and space for my cutting boards, housed in a cabinet right below:

And the draw below this space is home to more cutting/slicing/dicing tools:

And next to that drawer, right beside the stove, are tools I might need right there next to the oven or stove:

So how about that? A kitchen that makes sense!

Even children of the same mother look different

2011-07-01T19:32:00.005-04:00

I think even the computer was stumped on these...

MyHeritage: Family tree - Genealogy - Celeb - Collage - Morph

MyHeritage: Family trees - Genealogy - Celebs - Collage - Morph

MyHeritage: Family trees - Genealogy - Celebrities - Collage - Morph

Not so alarming anymore...

2011-06-21T09:50:00.004-04:00

**Note: This is from a couple of days ago, but it was too funny to not share with everyone. I'll post something original later.**

This is what woke us both up yesterday morning. This is our fire alarm. We have smoke detectors and this thing. We haven't had one of these since we lived in student family housing.

During our time in student housing, we had very frequent alarms. Sometimes in the middle of the literal night, sometimes in the middle of my figurative night. By the time we were moving, we'd had it with the alarms and drills. My husband often cited during our first months of living in our new place that were no fire drills--how nice.

Well, as annoying as those drills were, it appears that the inconvenience and annoyance wasn't the worst of its offenses. Apparently, I am now immune to the "alarm" a fire alarm should produce. When I woke at 6 AM to the noise, my first thought was, Awww man....I'm gonna have to find some pants...I even asked my husband what he was doing when he walked to the front door to look out like he was the nut.

Luckily enough, my husband's first thought when he hears the alarm is still, where is the fire, how will we get out, and what can I grab. Oh, and he was also already entertaining second string escape routes of lowering me down the balcony. Good thing he's around. (I also was unable to finish making dinner until he came home due to an extremely stubborn jar lid.)

Over the weekend

2011-06-20T08:32:00.009-04:00

We had a nice second weekend here. I started on Thursday trying to figure out what we should be "exploring", since everyone asks if we have been. I looked into a visit to Philly (only an hour away for us), but not much was going on. I think we will try doing that for the 4th.

Friday night we enjoyed dinner at Olive Garden, courtesy of a graduation gift from Brice's sister and family. We both had great meals, but Brice found he would be unlikely to get his sweet tea at a restaurant in this area.

On Saturday, we hit the Macy's sale at our pretty comprehensive local mall (most likely due to our lack of sales tax) and Brice got some new clothes for work and I got a half price Fossil purse. We grabbed some lunch at home and then went to explore the farmers market. I have to say, we were rather disappointed. I guess that's just modernization for you, but apparently these days farmers are able to get a bunch of rugs, knock-off handbags, and whole lot of other chatzki to grow in their fields. To be be fair, beneath the farmers market sign there was a sign that said "Flea Market" as well, but the two should have been switched. We saw two produce sections, combined about the size of the grocery store. Pretty disappointing after the Dekalb market. But there were little fudge and bakery type shops and real live Amish people selling, so that was kinda cool. We'll try the smaller market next time--I think there's a better chance.

After our shopping, we spent a little time at the pool reading/snoozing. I got in for a little swim, but Brice mostly napped. He found a restaurant for us to try in Wilmington and a possible ice cream store (!), so we drove over there for dinner. Very nice little area along the "river" with a walking path we checked out while we waited for a table. The ice cream place was already closed by the time we got there, so not sure how it rates. But if you, that's you, come to visit, we might take you over there. We came home and watched My Cousin Vinny. (I noticed Barry, Rachel's fiance from friends is one of the accused. When I looked it up I saw he originally tried out for Ross--funny, huh?)

We went to church in the morning and then to work trying to get the last bit of settling in done. My husband got pretty much all of the wall decorations complete and he built a TV antennae out of three feet of 2 x 4 and wire hangers. He's pretty impressive. We planned to break down all of the boxes in the spare room (we're keeping them all for our next move), but something is wrong with the air conditioning and the apartment was hotter than outside when the sun finally went down, so we couldn't really take it. Of course, after a few nights of leftovers and dinner out, this was the night I chose to cook again, and make bread. I took my first crack at baking bread other than biscuits, and it went pretty well. I think it could have been more enjoyable if I wasn't preparing it while worrying that it might bake right then and there in our apartment. (The recipe instructed me to leave it covered in a warm place--I asked Brice where he thought I could find one. He was mildly amused.) I used this recipe for hamburger buns, but I made longer rolls for Italian sausage, peppers, and onions. I'm hoping to make hamburgers in the near future and use this recipe again. I forgot to get pictures of mine, sorry. (These are the same buns Ashley made in Denver that I loved.)

I did find a tavern near the university with trivia, so tonight we'll be trying that out.

Review: Eat, Pray, Be Selfish

2011-06-17T08:33:00.007-04:00

It's been awhile since I joined everyone for coffee, so if you don't remember what was going on...We spent a month traveling and visiting friends and family and are now in our new home in Delaware. If you'd like the whole story, scroll down for posts about our trip our cruise, trip to our hometown, my trip to Denver, CO, and the drive up the east coast.

Since we knew we would only be in this apartment for eight months, we opted to not get cable. Most of our shows are available on the internet and we have Netflix, and we figured if cable wasn't available, we would find something better to do. So in the last week, I have watched several movies I have been meaning to watch for quite some time. One of these was Eat, Pray, Love. I liked the previews for this movie and I love Julia Roberts.

For those of you that haven't read or seen it, it's a true story of a woman who goes on a journey of self-discovery to Italy, India, and Indonesia. She leaves her marriage and eventually finds herself a new one (or that was what I think we were supposed to assume as they set off into the sunset). I can't speak to the plot of the book, as I never read it.

Around the time this movie was coming out, I read some reviews of the movie and the book on a Christian website. I tried to check the book out to read myself, but the waiting list at the library was miles long (go figure). My best friend had read the book, and after hearing about it from her and reading the reviews, I decided that it was probably best that I not read the book. It wouldn't enhance my movie experience--it would probably make me not want to watch the movie. From what I understood, the movie is a much lighter version of the book (as is usually the case) and I would do best to stay light.

I enjoyed the Italy section a good bit, and like many searches for truth that are not Christ- or Biblical-based, the journey has merit. (I am often distressed by narrow-minded Christians who are not able to see the value in another religious or secular journey.)

However, when the final love interest made his debut and it became evident to me that this was the happy ending, I wasn't quite impressed. This woman left a marriage where nothing was obviously wrong to "find herself". I felt sorry for her husband as he sat there and said, You never mentioned this before. You never even gave me a chance to let you find yourself within our marriage. She apparently never attempted to address the issues that were bothering her until they were sitting down with a lawyer. I'm not too happy with what this teaches about marriage. Then, she goes on to another man before she takes her trip. She mentions at one point being something of a serial girlfriend (my word choice, not hers) while on the trip. But then finally, there is the "happy ending" man and we're supposed to think that by being able to say "yes" to this guy, she has really accomplished something. Has she? I guess I thought maybe she had decided she was meant for singleness, yet here is another guy.

Maybe I missed something in not having read the book. There is a very good chance that she was struggling with depression, or any number of other issues. But as far as the movie goes, I'm seeing a lot of selfishness. Though, giving her the benefit of the doubt, I have to believe that she will be different enough this time around to not walk out on this guy.

Anyone else read the book or see the movie?

Enjoy the below blogs from my friends at Home Sanctuary.

The adventure continues...

2011-06-13T18:25:00.006-04:00

While I contemplated titling this post, The adventure begins, I realized it's all been an adventure so far--this is just another chapter starting.

Let's see...we left off with my return from Denver. I was very jet-lagged from my 6 AM flight+2 hour time difference, so I took a nap when I got home. The next few days were filled with packing, packing, and packing. We used two cubes that would be delivered to our new address for us, but otherwise, it was just the two of us. We left Atlanta for the last time Friday evening (far later than expected due to the tardy pick-up of the cubes by the company).

The plan was a dinner with all four parents, but we didn't arrive until after nine. They all had dinner together anyway and stayed a few minutes to chat with us. After some errands and washing the car we returned to Brice's parents, we were back on the road to Richmond Saturday afternoon. We spent a few days with Brice's sister and her family. The hope was to see our nephew play a game in his soccer tournament. Unfortunately, it was rained out. We had a lazy Sunday with a nice meal grilled out and our nephew managed the building of a catapult by Uncle Brice. We did some wandering around the mall on Monday and visited the science museum on Tuesday and saw an IMAX movie. Ethan's gym teacher coaches the neighborhood high school's men's soccer team, so we went to watch one of their playoff games.

We left Wednesday morning for Delaware, arriving in what seemed to be a widespread heat-wave. The two of us (mostly my wonderful husband) moved the majority of our life into a third floor walk-up apartment over two days of over 100 degree heat-index weather. It was shocking to experience that kind of heat. We hired one guy on Thursday to help Brice with our few heavy items.

We like it here, but we're not getting too attached. The area is quieter and obviously less busy than our old home. Reminds us more of our home town, but more like our home town was years ago. We live off of a main thoroughfare, so there are lots of stores and restaurants and everything I've had to go to so far has been really convenient. There are no upstairs neighbors, which is good for Brice since he is a light sleeper. His job is really close and very easy to get to and he said he didn't have any trouble with traffic this morning (his first day!).

The apartment itself is nice. I like the kitchen tons more than the last, though I liked the other apartment more for the rest (design, cabinetry, hardware and fixtures). But the amazing kitchen makes up for anything I'm not crazy about. We have three bathrooms now, which seems excessive for an apartment, but whatever. The bedrooms and bathrooms are the same, so it's compatible for roommates. We took the room that faces west since we enjoy sleeping in :-)

I had hoped to have my first company today, but haven't heard from them. My aunt and uncle were on their way back to NY from NC today and thought they might stop. No such luck, I guess, but I'll extend an invitation to our friends and family now. We have whole room and private bathroom and we'd love to have you. And I would love to make you something to eat in my fabulous kitchen!

Rocky mountain high

2011-06-08T16:36:00.001-04:00

A couple days after our trip to Concord, I flew (my very first airplane trip entirely solo) to visit my brother and sister-in-law in Denver. Brian had mentioned meeting me at the airport with a sign, and that's just his style. As I was riding up the escalator, I remembered this and tried to get out my camera, but it wasn't accessible enough. I wish I had. I saw the two of them with Ashley holding a "Welcome, Kelley" sign--to the left, Brian then held up an "Aunt" sign. No too phased since I am an aunt and we often refer to their dogs as my parents' "granddogs", I just said, I assume this is from the dogs? Nope. We will have a new niece or nephew for this Christmas!

This was my first time to visit them in Denver and my first trip to Colorado. I got a tour of the house, Brian's church (right across the street) and met all of his co-workers. The three of us went over to the flagship REI. We met up with the girl staying with them for part of the summer, Stephanie. She's one of Brian's former youths from Richmond with an short-term job with a church in Denver for the summer. Brian, Stephanie, and I went for a walk with Rory and Eli along a nearby dam. We had to get back to the house for a make-up confirmation class Brian was hosting. Stephanie and I played some intense rounds of Wii games before our little confirmation pizza party.

In the morning Brian, Ashley, the dogs, and I drove out to Garden of the Gods and Balanced Rock. Amazing and beautiful places to see. We drove into Mannitou Springs and walked into some shops, had lunch and got ice cream. After we got home, Brian and I took Rory up to the park on the corner for a walk. It was a nice day, as almost every day was. Great weather the whole time.

On Friday, Brian, Stephanie, and I drove up to Breckenridge. We had hoped to ride the gondola up the mountain, but it was closed for the spring to reopen for the summer the end of June. We went into town and grabbed lunch at Subway and ate at the dog park so Rory could have some fun and make friends. We visited a few stores in town before heading back to get ready for the Rockies game with young adults from Brian's church.

Saturday morning was lazy, then Brian, Stephanie and I went to Red Rocks, an extremely cool concert venue built into the mountain. Pretty awesome to see. As we were leaving I we saw two alpacas and got some pictures. We hit up a meadery (place where they make mead) later and I did some tasting and decided I really like mead. I think I'll be getting some soon.

Sunday morning obviously found us at church. Brian was doing liturgy. Afterward, we got the house ready for the young adults to come over to play board games. I took Rory for a walk on my own while others took naps. We had a fun time that night eating appetizers and playing Settlers of Catan, Taboo, Scene-it, and Wii tennis.

We spent our Memorial day strolling around an art festival downtown. Ashley and I really enjoyed it and we both found artists we really liked. My two favorites, here and here. I had my first meal at Noodles & Co. A fun place where you choose all different kinds of bowls of pastas and sauces. I suggested that we have a Memorial Day barbecue, so Brian grilled burgers and hot dogs and Ashley made buns. The buns were totally awesome, I could have eaten several. Then we all watched Clue.

I only took a short nap before having to get up for my flight. Brian drove me to the airport and I fought to keep myself awake through the security line. You know that rule about your liquids and taking them out when you go through? I have never done that. Ever. And I've never had a problem. Until this time. It was ridiculous. I could go on about the TSA silliness that went on, but I'll spare you.

All in all, a great visit. We did a lot, but not everything, so there is still some left for our visit at Christmas.

In the 'cord

2011-06-07T18:15:00.001-04:00

A couple days after our return from the cruise, we headed up to Concord. On our way up on Tuesday we met Jessica at her apartment in Charlotte. We had planned to take a walk, but the weather was less than stellar and things and it was still raining. We settled on frozen yogurt at Southpark. After getting to my parents' in Concord, we celebrated with a belated b-day dinner for Dad at Applebee's and then spent the evening with Brice's mom.

Wednesday morning I had a hair appointment to be sure I got one last good haircut. I met up with Lauren for coffee, catching up on the last year and details of her upcoming wedding. Brice and I had dinner with his mom that night.

Brice and I took my car to get much needed new tires. I spent some time with Jessica on a walk at our old elementary school and Brice headed up to Raleigh to spend a long weekend with his friends.

I went into school with my mom Friday morning to help her out and had lunch with all of her teacher buds (that I so nicely went and picked up for them :-) ) I even got to see my old classmate working as a music teacher at this school--like a real grown-up. I went to Jessica's mom's where Jess made dinner and dessert for us, her mom, and Heather. We had a great time catching up. Not sure when we'll all get to see each other again.

I got one last visit in Saturday morning having coffee with Heather before she jetted off to Vancouver. Since I won't make most weddings this summer, I went shopping for wedding gifts to distribute while I was in town. I took my mom to redeem her Christmas present pedicure that afternoon. In the evening I met up with my friend from nursing school, Justin and met his fiancee, Lee Anne. I was very glad to meet her and she seems very nice.

Sunday I got to attend my home church and see what was going on with everyone there. Always nice to see all those people. We came home and Dad and I washed both of their cars and mine. Brice got back into town and we spent the evening with his parents since his dad was back in town.

We slept in and went over to Brice's parents' for lunch before leaving. All in all, a very good visit.

Cruisin'

2011-06-07T18:14:00.003-04:00

And here begins my attempt to fill in the huge gap in my posting while I was on "sabbatical" this past month...

We had a nice time on the cruise, though it was a very different experience from my first. It was very relaxing with a bit less excitement at night and slightly less dazzling food. Beautiful sights and weather though.

If we go on another cruise, it will be quite a few years from now and we may try a different line, just to see.

Let's leave town on a permanent vacation...

2011-05-06T00:22:00.003-04:00

Today we are packing it up and heading south to enjoy a cruise. My last night of work was Tuesday, so I am now officially "between positions". If anyone knows of a good position in Delaware, let me know! Everyone gave me a nice little party at work with more food than you can imagine--nurses love to eat. Especially night nurses. I will certainly miss them all. I truly cared for them as much as they for me, I am sure. While it wasn't the perfect job, no one can expect to find the perfect job in terms of bosses and policies, etc. But it was a very good experience and it certainly could have been far worse.

This begins our month-long holiday as we travel to visit family and friends, taking advantage of not having to take vacation days or PTO.

My excitement for the day

2011-05-01T13:52:00.003-04:00

Looking out our back door, I saw something that wasn't there yesterday:
My elephant ear has grown a leaf!

With this ring...

2011-04-29T03:29:00.005-04:00

Just sitting here at 3:30 in the AM watching coverage from London. Luckily, I'm already on this schedule and I didn't need to stay up late or get up early.

It's not that I am a big fan of the royal family or Prince William or even Kate Middleton, but as I told my husband, sometimes it's just fun to be a part of something with everyone else. Also, I've been fascinated with Diana as I've gotten older and have been saddened that I was not old enough to really appreciate the icon and humanitarian that she was. Of course, there are not many similarities between these two women, but it's the closest I can get.

Anyone else watch the wedding? Did you attend a viewing party?

I want one

2011-04-20T10:01:00.001-04:00

These guys are too cute.

Rolling on ahead

2011-04-15T15:05:00.004-04:00

Since I haven't linked up in forever, I really wanted to make it in this week. Not a lot of time to write a good update post, but I invite everyone to scroll down to see our recap from our trip to Costa Rica and the latest news on our moving plans.

Last weekend I visited Concord and got to spend a great deal of time with one of my best friends, Jessica. Lots of shopping and talking and she even joined me for the dinner party/bridal shower for another old friend. I got to spend the night at her place in Charlotte and she joined my parents and me for church in the morning. We met her mom for lunch afterward as well. I got to see a lot of people and catch up and it was a really great weekend.

Brice spent the weekend in Aiken and Augusta at the Masters (yeah, he's that cool) and got to see his dad, brother, uncle, and cousin. He even got a TV spot on the 15th hole (of course, the year I am not watching for him like a hawk).

I'm working this weekend and we'll be in Aiken next weekend for Easter and Brice's grandmother's 90th (!) birthday. I only have about eight more shifts to work--weird!

Costa Rica

2011-04-03T16:47:00.013-04:00

For Brice's spring break, I took the week off of work and we headed down to Costa Rica--a long dreamed-about destination for Brice.

We arrived in San Jose Saturday around midday with plans to take a bus out to Quepos, a town on the coast. A cab took us all the way there and we enjoyed getting to see the countryside and a stop along the way to see crocodiles below a bridge we drove across.

Sunday, we took a morning rafting trip that came with a huge education on the plants and animals of the area, including what plant to make into a tea or paste to cure whatever ailment. Lots for me to take back to work :-) Our afternoon found us just relaxing at our new hotel's pool and enjoying an early dinner.

Monday we joined a large group for zip-lining, or canopy,
as the locals call it. It was a fun experience, but unfortunately,
not as dangerous-feeling as one might hope :-)

Tuesday, we explored Manuel Antonio National Park. We hiked through the actual rainforest (with Brice hoping for some rain to guarantee that it was a real one) and relaxed on a peaceful beach. After cleaning up back at the hotel, we enjoyed a beautiful sunset, passion fruit margaritas and huge burger's a Ronny's Place, a favorite for the view.

We planned to go horseback riding Wednesday, but were unable to make it into the morning group. So we spent the morning at the public beach. Wow, people say the Pacific is rougher, but it's hard to describe how hard those waves hit us. I guess the beach at the park was better because it was in a cove, but there was a significant difference. After laying (mostly in the shade!) and walking on the beach, we got ready for our riding back at the hotel. Unfortunately, our ride never showed. The owner of the ranch was very apologetic and came by the hotel, urging us to try the next day. Our plans originally wouldn't allow it, but we reworked things and decided to go.

Thursday morning we packed up our belongings and went riding through the rainforest. Brice had his first riding experience and mostly enjoyed it, so that bodes well for me.
We were given a free bottle of a special wine from the ranch in apology for the day before. Afterward, we caught a bus back to San Jose and stayed at a place recommended by Brice's cousin. We found a great dinner not too far away and made plans for the next day.

Friday we rented a car (eek!) to drive a few hours up to Volcan Arenal. It is an active volcano, but it has no erupted in six months. We didn't know this before we went, so we were hoping to possibly see some lava once it was dark. Driving in Costa Rica was an experience for Brice--very few rules it seems. In addition, our drive up through the mountains was very interesting. For those of you who know it, picture Concord Farms road, but with no lines and instead of fields, huge cliffs. In the dark. With people passing you. Oh yeah, and sometimes a cow standing in the road. Around a curve. At night. The best part was how the GPS would alert us to the upcoming bridges with a chime and the words "Dangerous bridge ahead". Apparently, there are no safe bridges. Seeing the volcano was awesome though, and we're very glad we made the effort.After dropping off the car, we were taken to the airport for our 1 am flight out. Unfortunately, we traveled back pretty sick and spent our weekend that way (hence the delay in pictures and recaps), but at least it didn't ruin the trip.

Let us know if you're ever going to Costa Rica--we'll be glad to give you some advice!

Fun times

2011-02-03T01:05:00.003-05:00

The past few weeks before this were work-loaded, or so it seemed. Right after Brice's birthday we had quite the snow and ice storm. The main problem was the ice and the fact that the temperature wasn't getting high enough to melt it--not really the snow for all of the northerners that laugh at our inability to deal with a small amount of snow. We ended up holed up in the house until I finally venture out to work on Wednesday. Another girl already stuck at the hospital swapped days with me and worked my Tuesday, so I worked Saturday. This put me working a sixty-plus hour work week. But things are finally back to a more normal schedule.

That week was also the first of Brice's in-person interviews. He flew up to Boston to interview with GE and the next week to Houston for Schlumberger. He received offers from both and is still pursuing some other opportunities. We'll see where things take us.

We just had a great weekend to spend entirely together on fun things. After dinner on Friday, we went to a fondue/jazz club called Dante's Down the Hatch. Extremely cool place with really interesting decor and an crocodile in a pond! After some drinks, we headed over to another bar and then to the Cheesecake Factory! Three words: red velvet cheesecake. Wow. I told Brice that every once in awhile, it's important to eat those things to remind you of why eating a random Little Debbie's or Chips Ahoy isn't worth it.

The weather was super warm and nice Saturday, so we played tennis. Or we hit the ball anyway. I'm working on it. We made chicken parmesan together and watched the movie Fletch (weird...). After church on Sunday we ran some errands and picked up some new furniture at IKEA. Nice, huh?
That's about it from here. Big news is on the horizon, but for now we're just figuring things out.

My birthday boy

2011-01-11T21:28:00.015-05:00

Brice's birthday was Sunday. Since I had to work that weekend last year, I decided this year needed to be good. So I came up with a few plans to make the weekend what I dubbed "birthday extravaganza".

It was supposed to kick off with a low-key evening at the Chili's bar taking advantage of our free appetizer, but Brice had been sick and he wasn't feeling up to it. So instead we started with a (surprise #1) breakfast at Chick-fil-a the next morning, testing out the new spicy chicken biscuit. (BTW--not all that spicy--I still prefer Bojangles'.) Then we headed to Dillards to pick out one of his presents (surprise #2)--an overcoat so he won't freeze at his interview in Boston. He looks quite dashing, I think:
We tried to use a Living Social deal that we had for skeet shooting after that, but Groupon had sent out a deal the same week and the place was packed. After an hour, we decided we'd better try another time.

That night we had dinner reservations and "after dinner plans" so I took the unaware husband to a Hibachi grill (surprise #3) and met another couple he didn't know was coming (surprise #4). After we ate, he got a Japanese birthday song, complete with funky drum and pre-ordered dessert with candle and digital photo (surprise #5). I had planned for us to go to the bar after for late-night trivia with our friends (surprise #6), but we had a bit more time to kill, so we hung out at the apartment for a bit.

His actual birthday on Sunday was lacking in quite as much surprise since we had snow on the way and I had planned to leave it a bit open. I was going to make his cake-substitute, but we ended up working on some chores and undecorating and ran out of time.

So yesterday and today I made these:
These are cake balls. I had them a few weeks ago at work for the first time and decided that I could probably live on them. Here is the recipe I used. You can use any flavor cake mix and frosting and add sprinkles or nuts. It's so versatile. I did Devil's food cake with chocolate frosting and sprinkles for my chocolate-lover husband and strawberry with cream cheese frosting by request for the girls at work. If you read the comments, the first person gives some extra direction that I found to be quite useful. I recommend refrigerating the cake and frosting mixture until it is easy to roll into a ball in your hands, like Play-Doh in Sunday school. This creates a much more compact ball than the melon baller method, which is what I did with the first batch, the chocolate ones. These did not come out looking as neat. After rolling your balls, freeze them. This can be anywhere from a couple of hours to overnight, it won't make much difference. They are tasty at this point, but the recipe calls for them to be dipped. I bought chocolate chips and white chocolate chips for this, but I probably should have stuck with the almond bark method. I will next time. I had to work to add water to get mine to the right consistency. I also ran out of white chocolate before I was done, hence many of the strawberry are simply drizzled.

I definitely recommend these :-)

I just don't get it

2011-01-03T00:08:00.005-05:00

I know all of my many, many loyal readers read my ode to the Christmas season last month. (Don't worry--that's sarcasm in print. I am not so delusional as to think many more people than our respective parents read my pontifications on a regular basis.)

So at this point, we all know what a Christmas fanatic I am. And I guess when New Year's rolls around, I'm able to get a small idea of what bewilderment others may feel toward my obsession with the yuletide. I am not into New Year's. I never have been. It doesn't make much difference to me to make a big deal out of a new year starting. The past two I have spent working. Every other before that has been marked by minimal partying, especially since the only real "parties" I can remember attending for the Eve were prior to my 21st birthday.

I volunteered to work these past two since I get time and a half and it matters so little to me and so much to others. When I was working last year and explaining how it actually wasn't my holiday, I said to my co-worker that I didn't understand why people cared. Apparently this person did, and she told me all about how people see it as a chance at a new beginning, a time to start over. I guess I see that.

But...it's kinda how I feel about New Year's resolutions. Why are we waiting for a new year to start good habits and end bad? My sister-in-law seemed to have the same sentiment the other day as she wrote about what she wanted to do in 2011. We don't do New Year's resolutions. If something is important enough for me to start or stop doing, why wait months to do it? Every day (or night in my case!) we get a chance to start over. New Year's is simply one of those, just like the other 364.

But...(again), that's just me. If marking the new year is what helps you cope in the changes you need to make and gives you hope for a new life, nation, world--then by all means, celebrate. We all have our ways of dealing and events that keep us renewed. It's not like I do the best job of implementing change on a daily basis anyway. I'm probably not one to talk.

Perhaps I should take a page out of your book. You know, the one that you resolved to read for the month of January as part of your read-a-book-a-month resolution. :-)

Happy New Year!

Christmas recap

2011-01-02T23:30:00.001-05:00

Here's another one of the not-because-anyone-is-interested-but-so-that-we-have-a-record posts.

We had a nice chunk of time in NC this Christmas. (Turned out to be the longest we have been there since we moved away.) I worked the Sunday and Monday before so that we were able to leave Tuesday morning when I got home. It was another pretty bad case of "work-lag" and I kept getting five hours of sleep each night.

Kicking off the week was a dinner at Brice's parents with his brothers and his dad's sisters and spouses. Great time to see everyone. The next day we hit the Billy Graham library in Charlotte with my parents. Brice found time in the afternoon to make his world-famous Chocolate Fudge Cake with Vanilla Buttercream Frosting and Chocolate Ganache Glaze. Yeah, that's right.

Thursday was a shopping day for both of us, followed by a great dinner with my parents and my adopted extended family--"aunts" and "uncles" the Browns and Mesitis, "cousins" Matt, Stephen and Leigh Ann, "Uncle" Jimmy, "grandmother" Mrs. Shearer, and dessert guests Heather and Stephen and Sarah and Danny. We even got to meet Paisley, Heather and Stephen's new puppy.

We opened Christmas presents like it was Christmas day on Christmas eve morning and then went over to Brice's parents'. After a nice visit, we exchanged gifts with his brothers and grandmother and had a delicious turkey dinner that included my parents. This was where we had to leave to get back at a decent hour. The plan was to go to church late, come back and open presents, but we were both a bit too tired. (As it later turned out, Brice was just trying to get me out of the house so he could tend to his surprises while I was gone, but I foiled his plans by being tired.) We ended up watching A Christmas Story for the first time ever and then doing our gifts to each other and from Brice's parents.

It was strange to sleep all day on Christmas. A very weird feeling to wake up, know it was Christmas, and roll over and go back to sleep. Brice went to church and didn't do much else, sadly. We did get some snow, so that created another inclement weather fiasco for me at work. The weekend went fine otherwise though. I certainly wouldn't want to make a habit out of working Christmas.

We hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas!

It's the most wonderful time of the year

2010-12-17T04:07:00.008-05:00

I've been giving Christmas a bit of extra thought this year. Every year I hear people trying to remind everyone about the true meaning of Christmas and berating the world for its consumerism and greediness. I guess I've never really felt that at Christmas. See, in general, I think Christians are a bit too hard on themselves and the rest of society. I hear Christians with young children trying to make sense out of the best way to communicate Christmas to their kids, sometimes giving different types of presents or questioning the introduction of Santa.

The thing is, I think it's totally awesome that the population at large participates in Christmas. We frequently remind our fellow Christians of "the reason for the season" and we know that's why we celebrate, but others do too. And basically, that's an open door for us. How great an opportunity that our holiday so central to our faith is publicized and promoted. Maybe instead of lamenting the loss of the religious aspect of Christmas to the secular world, we should rejoice in the opportunity it gives us to evangelize our fellow man.

Christians express frustration that they are unable to focus their faith during the season and parents stress about raising their children to understand Christmas properly. Well, let me share...

I grew up giving and receiving gifts on Christmas day. I grew up expecting Santa Claus on Christmas eve and watching Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. I also grew up reading an advent calendar daily during the month of December, attending a candelight service on Christmas eve, and finding at least one way to give to someone in the name of Christ each year. For anyone who wonders if you can meld the secular and religious traditions of Christmas, you can. My parents and family did, and they ended up with a minister and an ever-more faithful daughter.

I give gifts every year and not out of obligation, but a desire to give my family and friends something I carefully crafted, worked hard to find, or carefully chose. One year, I gave everyone a gift of a donation to a charity I selected specifically as something that person supported. The same feeling that went with that year is the same for more traditional gifts--a sense of thoughtfulness. Gift-giving does not have to be something you feel forced to do by the shopping industry. If it is for you, then don't do it. It's not for me.

Santa is also not the worst concept. I think the best defense I heard was on an old episode of 7th Heaven where Simon prayed for his younger sister Ruthie to have some way to believe in Santa Claus that year. He said she needs to believe in Santa, it's how she works her way up to the big stuff, like you. Include Santa or don't, but have a little faith in yourself that your child's belief in Santa will not be their downfall when you consider everything else you'll teach them.

While all of my ideas are good for me, I have come to realize in the past couple of years that maybe it's easier for me. You see, I think I finally understand that I have an above-average love of Christmas. And while it may just be coincidence, I say it's because I was born around Christmas. I really think there is something to this.

I have assumed my entire life that others love Christmas just as much as me. But the older I get, the more I realize that many people see it as simply an annual time of stress or disgust at the world, as mentioned above. But to me, it's such a time of renewal.

Winter has always been my season. For most of my life, I have preferred the cold. I love snow, I love sweaters, hats, gloves, hot chocolate. I think an extra-special thing about Christmas is that it is during a time of cold. The fact that we create such warmth and joy in the midst of all the cold and bleakness is a paradox that is quite beautiful to me.And Christmas carols--oh, how I love. I have a deep love for singing the most traditional songs. The words seem more simple and the praises more authentic. They fill me with hope, graciousness, and love. The First Noel regularly makes me teary-eyed, along with flawless renditions of O Holy Night (I refuse to sing this one personally since I do not have the voice to do it justice).

And finally, there is my Christmas "miracle". Every year, there is something, a moment, a person, an action, a statement overheard, that once again centers me in this "true meaning of Christmas".

I think more of us get it than we realize.

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

2010-12-06T09:36:00.002-05:00

Saturday my parents came down for a visit, their first time seeing our new place. We're glad it worked out since we had no Christmas decorations other than two ornaments we had acquired in the last week and one in September. After lunch, the four of us went over to the local tree lot and found a very nice tree. I think in the future though, I will have to trust my husband's judgment on size since trees do look much bigger in your house... :-)

Mom helped me decorate it after Brice and Dad got it into the stand with a trip to the hardware store for our very first saw. They took us out to Olive Garden before they headed back to NC, where it was apparently snowing.

My unit at work had a Christmas party that we drove up to, but it was pretty low-key. They did have some homemade spiced rum that was especially good when rum was added :-)

Your mission, if you choose to accept it...

2010-12-03T02:00:00.000-05:00

I have read about family mission statements before. Basically, you and your spouse sit down and decide what values are most important to you and on what you want your children to focus. And yourselves, really. You write it out as a family and post it somewhere that everyone can see it and it helps keep you focused on days when it's difficult to remember why you're doing what you do. When the family or a member in it is faced with a new choice, opportunity or commitment, you look to the mission statement to see if it supports your values.

I think this sounds like a good idea and probably one that most families do in a more abstract way. But maybe we don't all sit down and discuss what values we want to instill in our kids or support in our spouses. This goes back to the list-lover in me, but sometimes it can be a good thing to remind yourself on paper in what it is that you believe so that when you realize way too much is going on, you know what you should cut out or take on.

Does your family have a mission statement?

News from 2010

2010-11-29T05:00:00.001-05:00

We are so glad that you've paid a visit to our blog. Whether our Christmas card brought you here or you are a regular follower, we're excited to share some of what the year has brought us. We'll hit the highlights, but if you want more detail, just check out the links within to the archives. We welcome you to bookmark us or add us to your Google reader so you can see what's going on year-round. I have also found Facebook to be a great tool for keeping in touch (mostly) with the Daousts, and I welcome more friends from the Schultz, Cunningham, and Pridgen clans. I stay fairly active and will post pictures from time to time. As to the pictures on your card, from top to bottom they are my parents, brother and sister-in-law with us at my cousin's wedding, us at our friends' wedding, and us in Boston at the Union Oyster House. And now, without further ado...

Big news from the start of the year was my move to an RN role on a post-surgical floor. (You might recall this time last year I was a Nurse Intern in the ER.) I am still at the same hospital in Marietta and working nights. I worked about four months of day shift while orienting to the floor, giving us just enough time to adjust to that schedule before throwing us back to nights again.

This winter, Brice stayed busy with school, leaving his first semester TA gig for a more desirable one and also devoting far more time to his research. He did manage to squeeze in some time to judge local fifth grade science fair. I also got to see him assist in running a large competition between all the students in his class, attended by friends and family. Quite a show.

We had snow twice, once during a visit from Brice's older brother, Keith. The weather kept us inside, mostly watching the Olympics. He stayed for a long weekend with us on his way down to Pensacola for continue his education with the Navy. His health is great and he is looking forward to being able to start working on subs, even if it is a little later than he planned.

In March, we got a visit from Heather and Jessica. It was too short, but it was good to have them here and we made the most of the time we had talking, shopping, eating, and watching movies.

We had a nice Easter at home, just us. We enjoyed making lots of festive treats and had a cookout in the housing courtyard. Also in April, I was asked by the RA to help out with an event sponsored by housing by dressing up as Alice from Alice in Wonderland. It was one of the few events we attended, since most were aimed at families with young children, so it was fun to be a part of it for a little while.

We also made our trip to Stone Mountain for a fairly intense hike. Still can't decide if it is the climb up or down that is scarier. (Those of you who have done this know what I mean!)

In May, we participated in the Walk for Lupus NOW. We've done this annually since I was diagnosed in 2006, but this was our first time in Atlanta. The walk is huge here and the participation was impressive. On that note, I continue to be in remission for two and a half years now.

Also in May, we made a surprise visit to Concord for my dad's birthday and a late Mother's day. Brice had a guys weekend while I spent time with my parents. We also experienced the Renaissance Festival for the first time outside of Concord. It rained, and we got soaked (and muddy--no pavement at those...), but it was still fun getting to all the shows with such colorful characters.

We spent the summer squeezing in work and class between traveling for weddings. Brice's mom pointed out we made the trip to Concord five times in eight weeks! One trip was just a stop on the way to New York for my cousin Megan's wedding. We were glad to be able to see so many people in such a short visit, including my brother and his wife, in from Denver, CO.

Another trip to Concord was not for a wedding, but for my best friend Heather's bachelorette party. (This is the only wedding I was actually in.) It happened to fall the same weekend as our first anniversary, but I was home that night for a special dinner and our top tier!

The last week in August we conducted a progressive move to an apartment five exits north. We made the move entirely on carloads Brice and I took over together, and more that he took alone while I was working at night. Three hours with a Zipcar minivan and a lot of sweat later, we had done it. Essentially on our own (good thing we had so few things!). The new location is right next to the interstate, which is good for both of our commutes. It's a convenient area with lots of amenities and the apartment itself is great. It's a much better fit for us than the family housing.

As for our visitors to the new place, Brice's friend, Danny, paid us a visit while on his way from New Mexico back to NC and Jessica and her mom came by for a visit in August as well. Our friend Ryan saw us in September on a business trip and Brice's Uncle Rob and Aunt Judy took us out for lunch in October during Tech's homecoming.

In September, Brice and I flew together to Boston. Brice has spent a large chunk of time in school designing and building a small-scale "cherrypicker". His professor was planning to bring the machine to MIT for use by his students while he taught a class. I enjoyed a short vacation in Boston, but Brice spent most of his time working on the cherrypicker. We did some sightseeing and got together a couple of times with my old friend Leigh Ann. We also spent the weekend with Brice's mom's cousins, George and Ruth, who live in Wellesley. George showed us Lexington and Concord and the four of us went sailing on his boat. It was wonderful to combine the trip with getting to see friends and family.

Over Brice's fall break in October, we visited his grandmother in Aiken, SC the same weekend his aunt and cousin drove down. We also drove up to the GA mountains for some apple-picking and hiking while enjoying the fall foliage.

This year we spent Thanksgiving in Beaufort, NC with Brice's mom's extended family. It was a short three day visit, but great to see everyone. Brice was even able to participate in the family golf tournament.

I was able to become more involved with the Bible study I joined last year since I am able to make my own schedule (three 12 hour days a week of mostly my own choosing). I have missed very few since May and have been able to host now at our new apartment. In September, I decided to join the church, so I've been working on getting more involved. One area is joining the Wellness ministry and volunteering to perform blood pressure screenings the first Sunday of the month.

Our year has been peppered with less notable excursions to museums, festivals, parks, Braves games, Six Flags, and the occasional cookout, ice cream flavor invention, and pottery-painting. These are the topics you can read more about in the archives and that are linked to within this post.

We hope that you will stay in touch with us this year, whether through our blog, Facebook, e-mail, or the old-fashioned telephone or snail mail. Thank you for continuing to be a part of our lives.

Merry Christmas,
Brice and Kelley

Holidays are comin'

2010-11-21T18:01:00.004-05:00

So I began to write this post to share the above sentiment and went to look back at last year's with the same title...and whaddya know? I posted that one almost exactly one year ago. (One year tomorrow, which means it would have been on this same Sunday.) I also looked back to see that what we were up to was very similar.

Last year I reported on the Christmas tree lighting at Atlantic Station. Last night went better than last year. We headed out early afternoon to shop because Brice's brother had a 50% off coupon for an online order from Banana Republic and he was nice enough to let the whole family in on the deal. We knew enough this time to park in the nearby Target instead of trying for the deck. We had a late lunch at Moe's and then saw Harry Potter. (This was another thing we did together the weekend before Thanksgiving eight years ago!) This year we had a great spot for viewing several minutes before. What a difference experience can make.

We still haven't made it to the art museum--working Friday night makes me too tired for much on Saturday. I didn't work this past Friday night, but I did the two before and they made for some un-exciting weekends. Mostly we have been working on buying stuff for/decorating the apartment. Brice has been hanging a lot of things on the walls. Currently we are debating the issue of painting a wall in the living room and making a fake fireplace on the wall out of molding.

I am back to work tomorrow night and Tuesday before we fly Wednesday morning to Beaufort, NC for Thanksgiving with Brice's family. Technically, we fly to Raleigh where Brice's parents pick us up and drive us the rest of the way. We only have until Friday night, but it will be a nice get-together as always. I'm doing my best to get all the laundry, cleaning, and packing done tonight as though we are leaving tomorrow so I won't have to worry the next couple of days.

I'm making bleu cheese burgers tonight (another thing mentioned in last year's post) and then we'll probably have the leftovers and make a pizza with our Publix dough the next couple of nights. Our last Publix crust was really tasty, though it stuck horribly to the pan. Any ideas why?

And, just like last year, a shout-out to the birthday brother, Rev. Brian! (It's tomorrow this time though)

I will once again treat you to my favorite Christmas commercials at the end of this post--maybe we'll make it an annual thing.
Coke
My favorite

Goals

2010-11-19T04:19:00.003-05:00

I wish I was a more goal-oriented person. I don't think I have ever really understood how to make goals. I'm pretty sure this was a regular subject of guidance counselor-led classes in middle school and somehow, even though I completed the assignment, I never got it.

We had an assignment for a class in nursing school where you had to make a goal for all these areas of your life (school, family, spiritual, etc.) and I did it. And got an A. However, I did the entire assignment thinking these were all great ideas, but there was no way half of these things were going to happen. Even though the instructor did a great job of having us break everything down into what we were going to do on a day by day and week by week basis.

Sure, I can dream up ideas of things I want to do or make happen, but I have no clear plan of how to do that, no time frame in mind, nothing to keep me accountable. I'm not sure why I still can't seem to be goal-oriented, but it's something I want to work on.

Are you goal-oriented?

She's makin' a list....

2010-11-12T02:00:00.004-05:00

Don't worry--this isn't a post to get you stressed out about your Christmas to-do list.

I feel like I have found a few kindred spirits in this blogging world--probably because it takes a certain type of person to be a blogger, especially a hard-core blogger, which I do not claim to be.

So...how many other people out there love lists? I love lists. I make lists all the time. Lists of books to read, chores to do, people to call, clothes to buy, blog posts to write...I need to keep a list of all my lists. I love Google calendar. It makes my life so much easier and I love the task feature because it keeps lots of lists in one place and eliminates all the paper!

This can be a good thing, but sometimes bad. I have a problem sometimes spending so much time making my lists and putting things in the best possible order that I never end up accomplishing anything. Does anyone else have this problem?

That's why I have decided to stop myself the next time I start to make a list because I am overwhelmed with all the things I need to do. I need to just start doing something--I think that will get more done faster. We'll see how it goes.

Book review: Friendship for Grown-ups

2010-11-05T00:45:00.003-04:00

As some of you may perhaps remember (but most likely did not make note of), I was the random drawing winner in August. I received the book Friendship for Grown-ups by Lisa Whelchel in October and I don't read on a super regular basis like I should, so I just finished it two nights ago.

Lisa writes an easy read that is much like reading blogs of friends with just twelve chapters in around 200 pages, including three appendices for extra "tips". For those who may not know, Lisa was one of the stars of the TV show "The Facts of Life", and that is approximately where Lisa begins her story. She talks about the struggles she faced growing up on TV, away from her family, and too fast, showing how those early experiences shaped her friendship style later in life. From there she goes on to tell her journey of exploration about herself and how friendships between women can and should operate.

I was extremely interested in this book when Rachel Anne "advertised" it as a prize. We have been living here in Atlanta for over a year now, and I have yet to make any close friends. I was very interested to hear some thoughts from someone else, but I was a little surprised at first.

I am one of those readers who did not immediately recognize who this woman was. Not exactly being a primetime TV viewer when the show was on, I was several pages in before figuring out that's one reason I should have picked the book up. Oops. Maybe it was better that way.

There were a few things that surprised me about this read. One was that I thought the book was going to be more outwardly focused, more like self-help, telling me what I should be doing. Another was that Lisa entirely left her relationship with her husband out of the story. She addressed the fact that she was going to do this, saying that she wanted to focus on female relationships, but it was very odd to me that she would share such personal stories and was able to never once mention what role her husband played in these struggles. And then, speaking of the personal stories, I was amazed at how many examples she provided without giving details. So many stories of nameless friends in bad situations and "struggles" that were never explicitly described in anything but abstract terms. I found this different, but I think it was obvious why she wrote in this manner. Her book is very much written from a Christian woman's perspective. If it had not been, I doubt there would have been as much of an allowance for privacy. Which could also be another reason for her lack of stories related to her husband--spousal privacy.

I did, however I may have just made it sound, enjoy the book. I would not recommend it willy-nilly to every woman I meet. This book is appropriate only for certain people at certain times in their lives. I think I could have read this at another time and gotten absolutely nothing from it. But, alas, I did get something out of this book, enough that I made a list while reading it of topics I wanted to write about, some that will become blog posts and some that will remain private.

I will definitely pass along the book to friends who may need it. Look for my coming posts inspired by the book.

For posterity's sake...

2010-11-04T11:57:00.000-04:00

A very late record of the previous month...

Brice's aunt and uncle were in town the second weekend of October for the Georgia Tech homecoming game. We met up with them Saturday afternoon and were treated to a late lunch before going to church at CTK, the same church Uncle Rob had attended in college. It was great to see them both.

The next week I worked three days in a row to have some time off that would coincide with Brice's fall break. We decided to visit his grandmother in Aiken, SC for the weekend. We drove up Saturday morning and were lucky enough to be there the same weekend Aunt Patrice and her daughter, Elise decided to visit. The five of us had a nice lunch and a quiet weekend. This was my first trip to Aiken and Aunt Patrice drove me around to see the area. It's a cute town and this was my first time SC not just driving through or in Charleston. Brice said he probably felt the same way about Aiken that I do about Albany, so I tired very hard to see it the same way I thought he did.

We were home late Sunday night and decided to sleep late the next morning instead of forcing ourselves out to the mountains as we had planned. Instead, we got to the park for a great walk, lunch at a deli, IKEA for new furniture, and a few stores looking for a new jacket for Brice.

We resolved to get early enough Tuesday and drove north to look for some hiking and apple picking. The area we got to first turned out to not really be the hiking we were looking for, so we moved on to apple picking. We picked a bushel of various kinds at a cute little farm and I discovered that whether it is berries or apples, my husband is not the best fruit-picking associate. He prefers to be in charge of quality control and operation management. I believe he physically picked maybe five apples. (He did a wonderful job of planning our day trip, as he always does and I definitely appreciate that.) We did not eat our picnic lunch in favor of trying one of the dozens of country kitchens we passed. Our hiking happened a bit late in the day to go all that far, but we took two different trails to the upper and lower portions of a waterfall before heading home.

We went to Concord that weekend and saw our parents, Kyle, and Jessica and her mom. The trip was planned for us to be present for the ordination of the Director of Christian Education at my home church. I'd known Rob pretty much my whole life and been close with both of his kids. I was so proud to see the fruition of all of his hard work and determination.

We had dinner on Thursday with the couple we helped move and their friend. She made an excellent spread of Asian cuisine.

This weekend we hope to get to the art museum for the free day to see the Dali exhibit they have on now.

Sorry for so little posting, but it gets away from me sometimes. Don't stop checking in :-)

Through my car window

2010-10-08T08:14:00.002-04:00

When I was driving home Wednesday morning from work, I had the often-but-not-often-enough pleasure of seeing a beautiful sky from the rising sun. It was filled with blue clouds with golden halos around all of them. Texting while driving is now illegal (duh) here in GA, so I somehow felt that photographing might be too...so no proof of this.

I love seeing those skies--it might be one of the best things that can happen to me. I have mentioned to several people since moving here that one of the things I miss is not being around nature. I used to love winding down a road in my old town that cut through a cattle farm and looking out over the fields at a rising, or more likely at this point in my life, setting sun. I had a place I drove through every day on my way home from school where I turned off one road onto another and as I did, my front windshield swung across a field backed by beautiful trees as though I was taking a panoramic picture of it every time. (I did try to capture this once, not while driving, but I couldn't get it right.) Experiencing nature while driving alone is one of my favorite things ever. It's why I enjoyed the two hour drive alone to visit my boyfriend/fiance in college.

People best experience God in different ways, but I best experience God in nature. The most powerful moments I can remember are enjoying views from mountain tops or the roof of a Habitat house or across lakes or oceans or the quad in college...or cow-fields. Just imagining these memories makes me a little watery. There is such beauty in the natural world and I see these things and when I see them (most often alone through my car window) I say out loud, wow, God, it looks great. You did Good.

Berries and cream

2010-10-05T04:48:00.003-04:00

After a bit of a hiatus from ice cream making, we were at it again tonight. I knew I wanted to make it, but wasn't sure of the flavor. When I went grocery shopping in the afternoon, I walked in and saw raspberries and blackberries on sale. This was my jump-off point. And after a visit to the ready-made ice cream section, I had my idea.

Here it is:

It's vanilla ice cream with raspberries, blackberries, chocolate chips and a bit of toasted oatmeal. It was great, at least in my opinion. I thought about trying to do a white chocolate flavored ice cream or have some marshmallow sauce streaks through it. But if I make it again, I will definitely add some more chocolate chips and do about twice as much oatmeal, which will mean less berries just so it all fits. But I wouldn't cut down on the berries for any other reason.

Getting back in the game

2010-10-01T16:43:00.006-04:00

I know I have been absent from our Friday chats for a good while now, so I want to put out a short post to get back into things.

October--what?? I still hadn't adjusted to the idea that it was September and it's already moving toward the month by month holiday season. I have always preferred these months and the colder season (I attributed this to my winter birth and belief that the whole season is special for me :-) ) I love the cold weather clothes--sweaters, jeans, boots, warm socks. I love curling up on the couch in a cozy outfit with a blanket and a magazine with a fire blazing and snow softly falling outside...okay, maybe I got a little carried away for a girl who lives in Georgia... (I would move if it weren't for my circulation disorder and Florida-born husband!)

I just really look forward to this season and spending time with family as those occasions arise and wearing those clothes and feeling "cozy"--in a literal and figurative sense :-).

Weekend extraordinaire

2010-09-26T23:28:00.007-04:00

I think I've probably mentioned before how it seems that everything fun to do falls on the same weekend. Well, it happened again.

Friday night we enjoyed a night at Six Flags, hitting five of the roller coasters and two other rides. Saturday took us tailgating and to the Tech and NC State game, which turned out to be great (and a win for my hubby's alma mater, so he was happy). That night we hit the drive-in movie for the first time with the 20s and 30s group from church, also for the first time. I even got to make sausage balls in the morning for the tailgate and cookies for the movies.

And this morning, I joined that church. This is the first church I've joined, other than the one I was born into. So as of about 11:45 am this morning, I became a Lutheran.

Other than the fact that I have either horrendous allergies untouched by Claritan or a cold, it's been a very nice weekend.

We're still here

2010-09-22T23:57:00.002-04:00

Hi, folks! (and I probably mean folks in the most traditional sense since any readers other than our folks have probably rescinded their membership due to lack of posting...)

It's been an entire month since I posted a "what we've been up to" post. I'll try to be brief...

We both flew out to Boston Sept. 2 on what I felt was a very early flight, but was really only 8:30. Since we had three boxes worth of Brice's cherrypicker, it was handy that I was along for the extra checked baggage. It was a nice, timely, direct flight and we had an easy enough time getting to the hotel. I had done my best to get on a day schedule, but with only one day to do it in, I was beat. Brice took the boxes solo to MIT while I took a nap at the hotel. We met up later so I could see the lab and go to dinner at Legal Seafoods. Neither of us had ever eaten a whole lobster, so we ordered a small one and took pictures and had fun with the whole event. It wasn't exciting enough for either of us to want to do it again, but it was cool.

The next day I went in to MIT with Brice again and then I went off on my own, planning to meet up with my friend from church, Leigh Ann. I took the T up to Boston Common and walked around taking pictures and into the Public Garden. Leigh Ann and I met up there and went to check out the shopping. We ended up just walking a lot and talking and only went in about two stores. I picked Leigh Ann's brain for cool places to eat and we ended up at the Friendly Toast, back over in the MIT area. I rode and walked with her all they way back to the Museum of Science for her evening shift and then took the T back to Brice. I was actually asked for directions as this point and it made me feel very confident about my ability to look like a native. :-)

Back at the lab, Brice let me ride around on segway, which as dorky as it looks, is a really fun way to get around. If it didn't make you look so weird, I would definitely want one. We made our way up to the North End that night for some amazing Italian food at Bella Vista (recommend this if you are ever there--have the tortellini!) and cannolis at Mike's Pastry (this will be hard to miss with a line out the door and down the block). We even checked out the first Roman Catholic church in America built by Italian immigrants (so many qualifications, I'm not sure what was the unique part).

In the morning, we checked out of our hotel and were whisked off to a comprehensive tour of Concord and Lexington by Brice's mom's cousin, George. George grew up in Concord and explained to us the intense rivalry between the two cities. We saw the site of the beginning of the revolution, a couple of museums, homes of famous writers, including Louisa May Alcott and Thoreau's cabin at Walden pond. George and his wife, Ruth made us a great dinner and put us up for the night at their home in Wellesley. In the morning, we took the commuter rail to the T and Brice went to MIT while I continued on to Leigh Ann's apartment. We hung around there just catching up more and booked a Duck Tour for the three of us that afternoon. We met up with Brice for lunch and headed over to our Duck. Unfortunately, our tour guide wasn't the best, but we did see a lot of Boston and got to feel the spray off the Chahlles, er, Charles River. We walked around Quincy Market a bit and decided gelato was in order, so it was back to the North End. We played the, what's a cool restaurant game again and ended up deciding on Union Oyster House (oldest restaurant in America), but there was a two hour wait. So we put in our name and then it was back to the north end for cannolis at Mike's pastry. We had plenty of time to wait in the long line and still get a drink at the bar before being seated. It was great getting to see Leigh Ann and catch up. We parted ways in the T station running to get our respective trains. Brice and I headed back to Wellesley where George was kind enough to pick us up at the station, saving us a walk home in the dark.

In the morning, George and Ruth took us out to Salem Harbor for a ride on their boat, Extase. It was an absolutely perfect day for it. We had a great time and I even got to steer :-) Afterwards, we stopped at their favorite ice cream place, a nice independent eat outside perfect summer experience. Brice found a hotel in the city again for us and George took us to the train. It was fun to get to know them.

Tuesday was my last day so I went in to MIT again with Brice with all of our luggage and then off on my own to Harvard. After a while of wandering around on my own, I finally managed to hook up with a prospective student tour. Unfortunately, it was shortly before I needed to leave, but I was going to stay with them until I learned something at and about Harvard. It was really great, three stops on the tour and felt smarter already. I even got to one-up those Harvard wanna-bes by answering a question posed by the tour guide. I met Brice at the MIT student center for lunch and then I was back on the T headed to the airport. I realized while there it was the first time I had ever flown without a companion (as an adult).

Brice was in Boston through the following Sunday, but I'm hoping I can get him to tell you about his time on his own, including the whole cherrypicker part (kinda the reason we were even there, hehe).

After Brice got home that day, we went to help some new friends move. Dave and his wife Allison have just moved to Atlanta so Dave can attend GA Tech as well. I think I mentioned a visit we had with him while he was looking around at schools back in the spring. We invited Dave and Allison and their friend over for dinner that night. Brice's friend, Danny was in town for a conference that week as well, so he and Brice got to see a Brave's game together while I was at work Tuesday night.

This past Sunday night Brice and I went to see B. J. Novak (of NBC's The Office) at Tech. For the student price of only eight dollars we saw a very good stand-up routine. He's great to see if you ever get the chance.

Our friend from Concord, Ryan, is in town for work so we met up with him tonight. He came by to see our apartment and then we went downtown to finally experience Chicken and Waffles. It was great to chat about the business world we are generally not privy to and hear how things are going with him.

I have continued going to the inquirer's class at church and decided to join this coming Sunday. We're also planning on going to my work's night at Six Flags, and possibly tailgating for the State game on Saturday and doing a drive-in movie that night.

Hopefully this post will help me get back into the swing of things...

What I like about working nights

2010-08-27T02:05:00.000-04:00

My husband respects my current desire to continue working nights, even though it is not what he prefers. (We don't sleep at the same times, we don't have dinner together at least four nights per week, we can't go out at night together...) I've tried to explain what's so great about it, but I'm not very successful. Lately, I've tried to make a mental list while I'm there and here's what I've come up with thus far:

1. My boss is not there. Not that I'm doing anything maverick-ish, but you can relax when you're not scared you'll get caught doing something semi-unorthodox.

2. My time is my own. I have plenty to do, but you can use your time more independently at night. You're not being told, this patient has to go here now and this patient needs to be discharged now. You know what you have to do and you can plan your night as you see fit.

3. Things are a little slower. Being a new nurse, the pace of nights gives me time to get straight what it is I need to be doing and the best way to do it. I find that it's impossible to form good, correct habits if you're always rushed. Some nights are crazy (I had one just two weeks ago), but there are some that I have plenty of time to do all the stuff that makes me feel like I've done the best I can, and I enjoy that. As hard as it may be for our superiors to believe, we all want to chart as thoroughly as possible and do all the teaching and caring for our patients that we can, but it's pretty difficult with a seven patient load and no help from the charge nurse who has her own patients (charge nurses are never supposed to have patients). I feel great when I can leave knowing that I've taken care of everything that I could have possibly done for my patients.

4. People are more laid-back. The type of person who works nights (long-term anyway, not people who are just new and forced into it) are generally a different personality from people who work days. Part of it is the bustle, noise, and crowds of days. But part of it is just that people on nights aren't so hyper. Which also leads into my next point...

5. Nights are quieter. Yes, people are sleeping, but also we're quieter. We'll help each other if needed, but we tend to be more independent and do our work quietly (there's more paperwork to do on nights and less running in and out of rooms, or sending patients to tests, or calling doctors). I guess it's the nature of paperwork vs. the other stuff, but I feel more autonomy on nights. It's similar to #2.

6. Nights are more diverse. A lot of nights, I'm one of only two American born people on staff. There's about eight of us on nights total, but half of those are weekenders only. I learn about the other people; their food, language, how much they know about this country that I'm impressed to realize. Almost all of the day shift people are white (mostly blonde) mommy types, most with young kids, but up to college-age, too. Days are what work for them, and I know I wouldn't feel like I could do nights if I were them.

So basically, I feel like nights best support my need for independence and autonomy and give me a less stressed environment and set of co-workers.

Rice?

2010-08-22T23:13:00.010-04:00

I know what you're thinking--two days in a row?? What's going on here?

Brice had a fun time golfing yesterday while I caught up on sleep, blogging, e-mailing, and Army Wives (yes, I watch this). We went to the Pigs & Peaches festival in Kennesaw and picked up our pottery we had painted on our Groupon date night. Looks pretty good, huh?

We actually only saw one stand of peaches, but bought a bag, plus two different sandwiches (to get a good sample) and got a free one.

Brice also let me buy a nice size bag of cotton candy so that I could quench my constant craving and perhaps not get such a longing at our next Braves game. It rained on us off and on, but it wasn't too bad.

This morning we went to an inquirer's class at the Lutheran church we've visited and where I am involved in Bible study. We met another couple there, who, as I told them, are us a year ago. Just married, just moved here, he's in a grad program at Tech. I invited her to Bible study tomorrow. We'll miss next week's class since I'll be working, but we'll make three out of four.

I guess I also haven't mentioned that right after that Sunday of working I'll do two more days so I can get my hours in for the week and then we'll be on a trip to Boston/Cambridge. Brice's trip with school came through and I'm going to join him for the first part, so we will get a vacation together, but with some work mixed in. I'll try to get him to post about it.

We spent some time at the pool today and went grocery shopping together. I made an Asian stir-fry with rice for dinner. The stir-fry itself is something I've made a few times now and I enjoy it because I get to make it sweet and spicy. This is the first time I did rice instead of egg noodles though (I don't like rice for anyone who is not in-the-know). I think I did ok making good rice being a girl who's only ever made rice twice before. We finished it off with the last of our home-made ice cream from Friday night--our own version of rocky road. Our maker was an anniversary present from Brice's parents, so I'll post about our new flavors. Next up is red velvet, which my SIL Ashley made at home and we bought at Publix. Cake mix is in the pantry, so it should be soon. Bonus: there's no way we can fit a whole cake in there--extra cupcakes!

Brice starts classes tomorrow and I'll be back to work on Tuesday. Good luck to all the students!

And now, I can sleep

2010-08-20T21:49:00.002-04:00

I know this post didn't get up on Friday, but I really want to get back into participation and not miss another week! Please forgive...

I feel like most of this summer I have been telling myself, miles to go before I sleep... But now, it's finally over, or so it seems.

Not that I didn't enjoy the summer. As I have been telling you, I watched and assisted as some of the most special people in my life began their marriages. I did my best to document with pictures that I could pass along to them and as always, liven up the dance floor.

The last two weddings still not reported on were Heather and Stephen's and Jeremiah and Liz's. Heather's wedding weekend was incredibly wonderful. Heather and I have been through so much for so long and I had constant moments of, I'm-just-so happy-to-be-here-and-a-part-of-this all weekend. I got to be the driver of the non-family bridesmaids and we all had such a blast getting to and at all of the events. So now I only have one future wedding left to participate in (though no actual plans are in the works for this) and that's the one where I get to be a MOH.

Jeremiah's wedding was wonderful as well, though I was only a spectator. Their friends seemed to be having such a good time being attendants and they both were so happy to be married. The reception was held in a beautiful location at the NCSU alumni club. The Raleigh wedding also allowed us to stay with Brice's cousin and see his other cousin who stayed over on just Friday as well. Brice got in a visit with his college/high school friends still in the area while I got to see my cousin's new baby and I joined them later in the evening.

I hosted Bible study Monday night after our return for the very first time. It felt great to have people over and have places for them to eat and sit and even park. We're very happy with the new apartment and I'll try to do a tour in pictures next week. The rest of our time has been filled with both of us working, Brice finishing up the summer term, furniture re-arranging and one good night of grilling out here.

Monday of this week, the night I had off between the weekend and my weekday work days, we hosted Brice's friend from college, Danny. He was passing through on his way back from New Mexico to Raleigh from a summer research experience. It was very nice to see him since I hadn't since our wedding last year. He couldn't stay long since he had to get back to Concord that night, but he took an extra serving of lasagna for the road.

I started a nice break from work Thursday when I woke up and got a visit from one of my best friends, Jessica. (She and Heather visited in the spring, you may recall.) She had a networking opportunity in Birmingham (Southern Living!) and then came to see me before spending the rest of the weekend with her family in the area. She'll be starting culinary school soon and is hoping for something to come through in the magazine world for recipe creation. We had a fun time keeping her up past 9:30 and seeing her sleep past 6 :-)

Brice is out golfing this morning and I'm going to do...something. Or nothing. It's nice to have the choice.

Childhood sweethearts

2010-07-23T05:58:00.001-04:00

I don't have a lot of time to share this week. I have to get over to our new apartment since it's our official moving day and we're about to drive to NC again. My best friend Heather's wedding is this weekend and I'm really looking forward to the entire event, rehearsal to reception.

Just thought I would share the collection of anniversary cards we got this year. We noticed a very common theme among them....Thanks for all the cute cards and good wishes everyone!

Acceptance

2010-07-16T06:16:00.000-04:00

I have recently been meditating on acceptance and releasing oneself from the obligations placed on us by no one but ourselves.

This is the truth: I am not a SAHM. I am not a full-time housewife. I have a full-time job, not a part-time job. I work nights. I am a night person. I hate to get up in the morning.

I have decided to stop trying to be a super-productive housewife on my days off. I have no children, just a husband and there is no reason to be a martyr and put all of the chores on myself. I do not need to feel badly when I don't manage to cook a meal from scratch every night of the week I don't work. I should not feel so guilty when I don't leave my husband a prepared meal in the fridge. (He often doesn't eat it anyway.)

Being a person who gets up early in the morning does not make you a better person than someone who does not. As long as you are productive and use the time you are up at night like a person who spends all day working, what's the big deal? I have never been a morning person per se and I always take at least thirty minutes to get out of bed if I don't have a specific time I need to be somewhere. My dad always called this "opening my petals". And because my dad was a morning person and my parents generally valued and praised us for being up early and accomplishing many things before noon while admonishing us for staying up late, I always carried guilt for being up late. In my understanding, responsible, good people, and all adults for that matter, went to bed early and never slept past seven thirty.

My MIL stays up very late. She does a lot at night. She's no less productive than any other early bird. I still remember hearing her talk about grading our Math Superstar papers during Letterman when I was in fourth grade. I couldn't believe that. She was a grown-up! (Don't ask me who I thought did watch Letterman.) Once I could adjust to the idea that there were plenty of normal, moral, responsible adults who did not wake up at the crack of dawn or go to bed before ten, I could begin to forgive myself. Though in truth, I still carried guilt up until about ten months ago.

Once I finally had a job where I had to be up all night, I realized, lots of people do this. And I have no choice! There's tons of us! There is no shame! It is only recently that I have really been able to release my inner night-owl and know that there are places for us in the world. (I often wish I had a t-shirt that said, "There are people who stay up all night--just in case something happens to you.") I now fully realize that one doesn't actually have to get up in the morning (at least not every day), even to work and be a normal, moral, responsible adult.

And that feels freeing.

Workin' 7 to 7, what a way to make a livin'...

2010-07-15T03:40:00.001-04:00

Well, obviously it's been quite a while. I make no promises about posting regularly again until late August. The most important point of this post for me is to finish chronicling the events of our first year of marriage. If it's interesting to you, that's just a bonus. :-)

We left off a few days before we were preparing for our trip to NY. I worked the following Monday. Incidentally, it's very easy to work only one shift and knowing you won't be back for a week. I cam home and worked on packing and getting things together and then took a little nap until Brice got home. We drove to NC and spent the night with my parents, leaving very early in the morning for the extended portion.

The visit included us staying with my aunt and uncle while the rest of the family stayed at Mimi's, a lunch visit with dad's aunts, dinner and boating with dad's sister and husband, the wedding, lunch at Friendly's, Hoffman's for mini-golf and rides, and an ice cream "dinner" at a not-chain. Managed to squeeze some of the best things into just a few days, though the trip obviously lacked all the frills of a real NY summer trip.

More specifically on the wedding: It was at a lovely placed called Brookwood Gardens. After our wedding last year, Megan had told me our wedding was just how you imagine a wedding should be. Well, this is just how I imagine an outdoor wedding should be. The setting was perfect, absolutely amazing. We had wine, cheese, fruit, shrimp. The (SIX!!) cakes were all different flavors and made for her as a gift from the inn where she worked. She looked beautiful in her mother's dress, the wedding party was barefoot, we all had unique wine glasses we got to keep, there was beautiful music and dancing and fireworks to finish. In addition to our glasses, the groom had personally made one pottery plate for each guest to eat from and then take home. Best of all, they both were extremely happy.

We did the traveling in reverse on the way back down, with a stop overnight with my parents. Brice's grandma was in town to leave in the morning on a trip with his mom and aunt, so we were able to stop by and visit with them. Brice even managed to get a pancake breakfast from his mom the next morning.

The week followed with my first attempt since the ER of working three shifts in a row. It really wasn't that bad, and nothing like the ER. Once that was over, I left Friday evening to drive back up to NC by myself for my best friend Heather's bachelorette party. I got to see our other best friend Jessica at the pool on Saturday as well. The party was great; a very large group of mostly her sorority sisters went to dinner and a couple of bars. We all stayed at a nearby hotel for the night and went to IHOP in the morning.

And...that morning was our very first wedding anniversary. I made it home by six thirty for our anniversary dinner followed by wine and our cake top. Still good, though the icing tasted a bit off. We'll be going out to eat in some undisclosed restaurant at an undisclosed date when we are less busy. Once these details are disclosed to me, I'll let you know.

I'm working overtime this week...three weekdays plus the weekend. It was a scheduling error and the blame is sort of up in the air, but I feel obligated to just suck it up after all the bad nights of understaffing of which I have been a part lately. Things should be getting better in the coming months as new nurses come off orientation and people stop taking so much vacation.

Next Friday we'll be on our way back up to NC for Heather's wedding. I'm really looking forward to the whole weekend, rehearsal to hair to last dance. Then we'll have a harried week of moving, another wedding, and then...hopefully...things will slow down.

I'd love to get back to sharing my new recipes and adventures, but lately it's all I can do to get to the grocery store. It's amazing this post is done. To be continued...

Just...fashion...

2010-06-25T02:53:00.003-04:00

Our trip last weekend for Jenny and Rob's wedding was great. We got in a visit the first night with Brice's parents and even ended up getting to see them Saturday morning since they were delayed leaving for their own trip. I got a short visit over coffee with Heather and Jessica and then we saw my parents for a bit. My sleeping was a mess trying to operate on a day schedule for the weekend so I had been up since 4:15 that morning and needed a nap before the wedding. It was a very nice ceremony, officiated by Rob's sister (an old and very good friend of my brother, also a minister). She is a wonderful speaker and is definitely Exhibit A in the case for female clergy. The reception was great since it was a bit of a middle school reunion. Rob and I (and Brice) were in elementary and middle school together, but Brice and I went to the new high school that was built while Rob stayed at the old. So there were several blasts from the past, mixed with the more recent college friends we had also shared after the brief separation in social circles. I also got to finally meet the girlfriend of my dear (brother-like) friend, Matt, and I must say, I think he may have finally found it... :-)

We spent Father's day going to church with my parents who had a nice full pew with us and their additional "son" Matt and girlfriend, which I think always makes parents with grown children happy (especially on holidays). My parents made a nice lunch before we left.

And surprisingly enough, my dad actually got to see both of his children on Father's day. My brother and his wife (Ashley of Sidetracked) were in Guatemala for a mission trip last week. In a somewhat confusing story of oversleeping and language barriers we learned that two of the teenage boys had been left behind and my brother was the one to stay back and retrieve them and guard them for safe return. They had a connecting flight in Charlotte that was delayed and ended up staying (all 3) at my parents' for the night, with my mom getting to do all of the laundry (she knows she misses washing all of our summer camp stuff) and empty the fridge.

Wednesday night we tried to do some trivia, but the website must have been wrong because when we got to this place, nothing was going on. We ended up going to Jos. A. Bank to look at suits for Brice. Turns out there was a sale going on, but we got there 30 minutes or so before closing. We scouted things out to return last night and purchase two suits. One with a jacket that fit Brice perfectly right off the hanger. I must say, he looks rather dashing in both.

This time next week, we'll be in New York and I'm quite happy about it. We'll leave Tuesday for NC and spend the night and then do the rest of the trip Wednesday with my parents. Going to NY is something I have done almost every summer of my life (I think I missed two years ago). We even worked a stop in on our return from our honeymoon last years. To me, it's not really summer without a trip there and being there is a huge part of how I define summer and it's essence in my mind. I've posted about this before, so I'll just leave it at that here.

In one week, it will be my cousin's wedding day--so happy for her, and everyone in our family that we have this excuse to all be in the same place!

The title for this post comes from a bit by Ricky Gervais we often quote...

Wedding season

2010-06-18T01:04:00.002-04:00

It is upon us. This weekend is when it starts for me, though others may have started a few weeks ago. I have four weddings this summer, all for dear and important framily (friends like family, but also family). I know how excited they all are and I can feel my own excitement from those pre-wedding days still. A little about each...

Tomorrow my friends Jenny and Rob will get married. I met Rob back in elementary school when I met my husband. Rob was around for some of the first group dates that got Brice and I going. I met Jenny in high school through church. She and Rob hooked up this way and then we all ended up at the same college. After a tumultuous year and a half there where we were all friends and not, they eventually began their dating relationship. They will soon start their happily ever after as a choral teacher and lawyer (probably eventual senator).

The next is my (once) twin cousin Megan and Gerad. Megan is a year younger than me and we had many fun summers together growing up. I would visit NY and we would dress in matching clothes and hair and try to convince people we were twins. She met Gerad during a study abroad experience in college. They are both wonderfully creative, adventurous, and compassionate people. This fall Gerad will start grad school in Chicago.

Heather has been one of my two best friends since the day we met in the same fourth grade class where I met my husband. We've truly grown up together, passing through all of life's major events with endless discussions about those milestones. She has gone to the same church as Stephen since they were little kids. When Heather started college at the same university as Stephen (and me, and Jenny, and Rob), they started hanging out--and that was it. I'm very excited to be a part of this wedding. Heather will be an accountant and Stephen a lawyer.

Last is my friend and pseudo-brother, Jeremiah. We've gone to church together since we were kids and have been through many changes over the years. Jeremiah and his mom are in attendance at almost all of our family holiday gatherings or just special events. He is marrying a girl he met in college through campus ministry events. I don't know her very well, but she seems lovely. Jeremiah just graduated and plans to teach high school math while Liz continues her studies in nursing school.

You may have noticed a theme. I tend to find friends and hang onto them. I am so happy for all of these people and I wish them marriages as happy as mine.

Celebrating

2010-06-11T02:30:00.004-04:00

Tomorrow is our anniversary. Not our wedding anniversary, but important all the same. My husband and I will have been "together" for eight years.
I know since I'm a newlywed, many will hear this and roll their eyes, but--I think my husband is the best one in the whole world.

When I worked days (and most of the nights I worked) he made my lunch for me and slipped in a note. Every time I make dinner he tells me several times how good it smells or looks and always thanks me afterward. He does the dishes for me and he tries very hard to remember to wash the towels each week. He even folds and rotates them for me. And even though I have compulsive rules about cleanliness and "contamination" (I'm a nurse--I can't help it!), he knows it's important to me so he does try.
Most importantly, he is a good friend--he's nice. He calls on his way home (though I almost never answer because I'm busy with the phone across the room--sorry, honey!). He asks about my day. He tries to find things I would be interested in and encourages interests and discourages me from my tendency to not spend money on things for me. He only plays video games when I'm not around (or sometimes if I'm busy with a project). And he puts the toilet seat--and lid!--down.
During our pre-marital counseling, our couple offered a question they still ask one another when an issue comes up--who has the greater need? I think this has been extremely worthwhile to remember for both of us. There are a group of issues where it is me usually, and a group where it is him usually. However, I have to say, I think my husband lives this much more than I. I'm not sure others always realize all that he is as my husband when he is being their teacher/classmate/friend/son/brother, but however wonderful he appears in those roles will never exceed this one.

It's been a wonderful eight years and even though we have a wedding anniversary to celebrate now, it's hardly where the journey began and I know I'll continue to observe this one.

Hardly aged a day...
Then:
Now:

What happened next

2010-06-08T23:50:00.005-04:00

Another update about our adventures...

We had a great Memorial weekend. I won't go to bed any earlier than about 1 am now, so our days have to start a little later. Saturday took us to the Decatur Arts Festival. The forecast was a little uncertain, so we held off until Sunday to spend some time outside. We bundled up and headed to the farmer's market and a bakery where a Food Network challenger works then had a picnic with our finds in the courtyard here. The park was occupied by the jazz festival that was $15 just to park. There wasn't enough time for it to really be worth it for us. Since we're moving, we decided to look into some new items by going to IKEA for a little browsing and then heading off to evening church. We finally saw The Blindside, which was great, though extremely sad in the beginning. It was another one of those movies where I have a tendency to talk with the accent of the main character afterward.

Monday we went to the Braves v. Phillies game. It was hot, but fun, with lots of tributes to the military. There was a Beach Boys concert after, which I found to be quite a thrill. To round out the holiday, we had hot dogs, pasta salad, pickles, and chips.

After working Thursday and Friday, I attempted to do it all by attending a baby shower for a woman in my Bible study without going to bed. I took a nap for a few hours and then we went out for our swanky dinner reservation--at Chick-fil-a. The area stores were taking reservations for a free new spicy chicken sandwich. From there we went to the Coca-Cola film festival at the Fox to see Jaws. We sat in the balcony since it was something we'd never done and had a good time.

Brice had gone golfing in the morning while I was at the shower and part of my nap time. He was pretty sore on Sunday and I was still tired, so we had a nice lazy Sunday.

Monday night was my first night off of orientation. The night started out a little bumpy, but I assumed that it would and by the morning, I was feeling quite good. I'm very satisfied with the career, hospital and unit I've chosen to work on. There are a lot of good people and I think I'm working in the right area for me--at least for now.

Songs about rainbows

2010-05-28T08:33:00.000-04:00

Imagine you're five years old. Your dad tells you he will build you a tree house. He picks out the perfect tree; it's lush and green with plenty of shade but enough sunlight will be let in. He picks out the best wood from the lumber yard. He works hard on it for six weekends, from early in the morning until late at night. In the last couple of weekends, he's working on details and he asks for your input. He tells you to invite your best friend over and the two of you tell him just want you want. He finally finishes it; it's the best tree house you or any of your friends have ever seen. It has a zipline, a ladder, a rope (that you can swing out on and drop into a pool), windows, a porch, a bed for camp outs, a fridge for snacks and a microwave to make those pizza rolls you love--it's even got a sink that'll run water. You don't think you'll ever leave your backyard. Now--how will you treat this amazing kids' paradise he's given you (and your friend)?

Being green is being trendy these days. And unlike my usual revulsion for trendiness, I think it's a good thing. It's becoming much easier to do those simple things than it used to be so more people do them. And because more people do them, it's easier. Great cyclical effect here.

I'm not die-hard; I drive a car that is not a hybrid, I use some inorganic items and mostly, I draw the line at paying twice as much for something natural. But truthfully, my heart is in the right place and I really do try. There is only one occasion I throw away something that can be recycled. That is my can of V8. It's very messy to tote that home with me from work. I've tried it, and I just had to say 3 cans or so a week would need to be sacrificed. But otherwise, I'm the recycling queen.

There are some people who still argue against environmentalism under a biblical defense. This blows my mind. I have never ever seen how taking care of the planet would not be what God wants. It seems so obvious to me. God created a beautiful earth; He said it was good. Our earth, our bodies, each other. They're all gifts and blessings from God; what doesn't make sense about doing our best to take care of all these gifts?

I got thinking about this from a post I read this past weekend. Check it out; share your thoughts with me. Take some time to think about what it might mean to take care of yourself of all of God's creation instead of just "being green".

10 points if you can make sense of this title.

I like to boogie

2010-05-26T00:42:00.001-04:00

So I am a night owl once again. I apologize for the lapse in posts. I didn't post a couple of weeks ago because we were planning a surprise visit to Concord and then with the switch to nights, I just never got back.

My last post was from the day before the Walk for Lupus NOW. There were warnings about lack of parking, so participants were told to take the MARTA to the station just up the street from us and take a shuttle to the park from there. The park is actually on the same street we live on, just about a 30 minute walk east. We decided to make that part of our walk. It's extremely well attended here (about three times as many people as Charlotte) and the design of the park allows for much more exposure, and therefore awareness.

Brice and I headed to Concord as soon as I got home from my last day shift, Friday before last. We'd talked about going to see our moms the weekend before, but we would have missed the Lupus Walk. Instead, I we got a two-for-one deal by surprising my dad on his birthday. We stayed over with Brice's parents late Friday night and then drove over to my parents' in the morning. Brice had plans to meet up with his friends whom he has seen only once since our wedding, so he headed out to play golf and enjoy a day and night at Badin Lake. I spent the day with my mom getting our hair done, having lunch, and picking up my bridesmaid dress for Heather's wedding. We all got dressed up for the church dinner dance and headed out for that. It's great to see these events from the other side, without having to do all the planning. The kids in the Senior Highs right now are really stand outs and some of the best kids to go through that group.

The Monday after we got back was my first night. I have to say, working nights is so much easier if you have done it before. I immediately fell back into it and I absolutely love the idea of nights. If I could work nights and not miss time with my husband or feel like I had less time to do chores and errands or not miss fun night time social events and not have bad traffic, I would love it. I much prefer the night life and I am far more agreeable at 4pm than 5am.

Brice had a first day too, starting his summer class. He has a math class Monday Wednesday Friday and he still goes in to work all day in the lab. His professor is in Spain for the summer, but there's no goofing off. The students are using a crane in the lab here from Spain (boggles the mind, huh?) and had a little malfunction. Brice had to go over to the lab and fix it so the students could finish their assignment. Never thought my grad student husband would be "on-call". He was also given a translation assignment once the professor saw him communicating with the students in Spanish.

I was supposed to work the whole weekend, but replaced Saturday with Thursday so that my preceptor could go to her son's high school graduation. It was nice because it opened up Saturday for us to go to the Renaissance Festival. We had fun even though for an hour or so it rained off and on and we got soaked. But we dried and saw some fun shows. We decided to grill out (not barbecue--I'm getting this now with like 95% accuracy!) bleu cheese burgers with corn again. I highly recommend grilling your corn. Brice says it is comparable to boiled hot dog vs. grilled hot dog. Publix also has some outstanding hamburger buns. I hope we still have some nice weather for more grilling (read: not too buggy or humid). We've done it three times now and it's just so nice. We spend the whole time outside together since it's not like we have a grill on the deck and we're out there for a couple of hours preparing, cooking, and eating.

I worked Sunday night and made it to Bible study on Monday for the third time in a row. Quite a record--I think they might start to remember what I look like :-) Our hope is to have more seating at the new apartment (oh, yeah, we're moving--I guess I didn't mention) so we will be hosting the second week in August. Gives us a nice deadline to not waver too long with getting things set up.

So yes, we'll be moving the end of July. It's a place a little further north with lots of amenities, more closet space, and a nice area, walking distance from the library. We're very excited about it and all the new possibilities it offers.

Stories that speak to us

2010-05-07T16:00:00.000-04:00

When I was young, I was an avid reader. It was pretty much what I did. I had a big imagination that fueled my unguided playtime (mostly outside wandering around "pretending" or occasionally inside at the same task). But other than that, I read. I even got in trouble for reading. I was usually awake for about two hours after I was put to bed and I would often get up and go to the bathroom to read (with a book hidden in the waistband of my pajamas under the top--prompting my parents to think I had horrendous constipation as a child) or read by nightlight. It's the nightlight one that got me in trouble and sentenced to a bedtime two hours earlier than usual since I was found up two hours later.

Elementary school is a great time to be reading, or at least it was in my day. Now kids are often forced away from books they really enjoy because their reading level is far above those books. I hear a lot about it from my mom, an elementary school librarian. But for the most part, kids aren't assigned much textbook reading. Reading is that filler activity that comes when you've finished your work early (my basic incentive for finishing my work quickly).

Sometime during middle school, probably in the middle, I stopped reading so voraciously. I do remember still finding some great books in sixth grade, but my memory flags during seventh. I guess the books that are still with me today are mostly from the fifth and sixth grade period and I would recommend them to readers with girls/children that age.

The Great Gilly Hopkins by Katherine Paterson was a book I read during the fifth grade. And while I don't remember every detail of the book, I remember re-reading the last couple of pages of the book several times after finishing. Not long ago, I was helping my mom in the library and came across it. I flipped immediately to the end and re-read that same section that brought tears to me then and still does. I don't want to spoil the end for anyone, but the story of this foster child and the difficulty she faces has always spoken to me. It's this book and Angels in the Outfield that makes me want to be a foster mother.

The other book that still stands out for me is Jacob Have I Loved. Katherine Paterson wrote some great books for kids this age and this one in particular just seemed so honest to me. I loved the image I had of the island and free spirit the main character had. And to be perfectly honest, being a nurse/midwife in an Appalachian mountain town seemed very close to home. I also re-read the end of this book when I found it in my mom's library, but I actually took it home to read in its entirety. I love the ending and particularly this quote from her future husband, "God in heaven's been raising you for this valley from the day you were born." It continues to speak to me in a figurative and literal sense even many years later.

Any childhood stories that spoke to you?

The Screwtape Letters

2010-04-30T07:10:00.000-04:00

I'm willing to wager that a great number, if not the majority of you have read this work by C.S. Lewis. I have heard a great deal about it over the years and it's been frequently quoted and referenced in different church-related groups I've been in. So when I got an invitation to a discussion of the book, I thought it would be good time for me to finally read it.

Bottom line: I didn't finish the book. I returned it to the library weeks ago. Of course, I know plenty of people who loved it and I'm glad. It was obviously well-written and you'd be hard-pressed to find anyone who doesn't think C.S. is a good writer. I stopped reading it because it wasn't affecting me the way I think he intended.

For those of you who don't know the book, Screwtape is a demon writing letters of advice to his nephew, Wormwood. Each chapter is one letter and while Screwtape refers to Wormwood's replies, we never read a letter from Wormwood, or at least I never did. The whole world is backwards where good is evil and evil is good and "the Enemy" is God. He advises his nephew about his "Patient", the human he is responsible for tempting toward evil.

It's interesting to read Lewis's ideas of how demons are working in our lives and recognize the same situations he is suggesting are ones we find ourselves in, such as selflishly praying more for ourselves when we think we are praying for another. He points out a lot of these situations where the Patient will think he is doing good, but he's really not. It's very thought-provoking.

The problem is, I spent so much time seeing myself in the Patient and how I do things I think are good and faithful, I began second-guessing everything, down to the thoughts I had while reading the book. I began to think, maybe even the book was a backwards way to get me to think I was developing spiritually when I really wasn't.

I don't doubt that it was a good read for many, it just wasn't working for me. It just didn't bring the results I had hoped it would.

Our story

2010-04-23T12:00:00.004-04:00

Inspired by my sister-in-law's post awhile back, I decided to share ours at some point. That point is here.

Ashley mentioned in hers being one of "those" couples. Well we are one of "those" couples, but another category. We are one of those couples who had a long history.

Once upon a time, there was a little boy in Florida who moved with his family to North Carolina and started at a new school in fourth grade. Meanwhile, there was a little girl whose parents wanted to move to a different area so she and her brother could go to better schools. They finally chose a place and the little girl joined a fourth grade class halfway through the year. In her class, she saw a cute little boy with red hair. She was lucky because her assigned lunch seat was right across the table from him. She always tried to be next to him whenever she could. (Which is why she ended up next to him in pictures from school.)

They were in the same gym class in sixth grade, but they didn't have classes together anymore after that. The little girl was disappointed when she found out they didn't have classes together each year. She still thought about him once in awhile and saw him at school-wide events, but they didn't talk. Soon she didn't think about him at all.

When they went to high school, she still didn't have any classes with him, but her friends did. When Christmas break started, she went to the movies with her friends and they invited the boy. The girl was putting butter on her popcorn by herself and the boy walked up to her. He started talking to her again and she suddenly felt just the same as she had before.

Brice and I didn't become official for another six months, and it was almost six and a half years before he took me back to our elementary school and asked me to marry him. Maybe we didn't have a lot of dating experiences, but I think both of us learned just as much in the seven years we were together. In many ways we grew up and learned together as we experienced major moments together and we still do.

NEW CUP!

2010-04-19T18:03:00.004-04:00

Brice didn't make it home from golfing until around 7:30 Friday night so only caught the last couple of innings of the game. It was still fun to stroll over in the nice weather after dinner. We've been enjoying some of these evenings sort of pretending it's summer since we have the time but it's not as muggy or buggy.

We had heard from Brice's aunt that they were in town, but after talking to her Saturday morning a visit wasn't in the cards. We just headed out for our meeting with ProMove to look at apartments. They gave us information cards about more than thirty places and then assembled it into this portfolio we can look at online. No particular place jumped out as completely perfect, but there some nice options. After a nice lunch at Subway we drove around in search of The Dump, which is warehouse that almost looks like IKEA from the outside (but without all the floors) and sells damaged furniture. Nothing really jumped out at us there either.

After a long nap and making pizza, we headed out to RiRa to see a cover band called The Commitaphobes. It was fun, not quite as cool interior as Charlotte's but smoke free. They didn't start until 11 so it was a late night so we slept in and went to chuch at noon.

A few weeks ago, our RA (who lives directly across the hall) asked me to play Alice for an un-birthday party they were throwing for the kids here. I hadn't seen Alice in Wonderland since I was about five or six, so I watched the Youtube clip of that scene. While I know most people say Lewis Carroll was on drugs while he wrote the book, I think the writers of the Disney movie would have had to be as well. (I recommend watching it though, it's so much better than I remember.)

I think the kids had a great time and I joined the Mad Hatter, the Red Queen, and the White Rabbit for picture-taking. We'll post a couple shots Brice got of me with the kids. It was nice to have a reason to drop by since most of the events are for people with kids and we'd normally have just watched from the window.

After my popularity died out, we took the MARTA out to the Sweetwater festival. I spent three dollars for a guy to guess my age within two years (naturally, I thought I had this) and he guessed twenty-four! Brice and I decided he must have overheard me say "here, take my rings". It was my first trip on the MARTA so that was the highlight for me.

This morning we got an early start and went up to Stone Mountain. The 1.3 mile hike up was a bit more than I had counted on, so we nixed the 5 mile loop around the mountain and just enjoyed our picnic and watched a couple videos about the Civil War and the carving process. We both really enjoyed the (self-made) long weekend and I'll be working this one.

A different kind of week

2010-04-16T16:44:00.002-04:00

First off, I want to thank Rachel Anne and all of you who visited and commented on my post from Monday. Rachel Anne gave me a wonderful opportunity to reach a larger audience and I am most grateful for her help and all of the kind words sent my way.

I felt that I had left out a couple of reasons why I was doing better for the sake of making a point to lupus patients who do not take their medications. Besides meds and rest, I need to give credit to the many family members and church family members and friends who prayed me to wellness and continue to do so. I am most grateful when I have had a very busy day at work and I can realize that I am able to do all that standing, walking, sitting, and lifting and that I was actually able to make it through nursing school to even have my job. During remission it is very easy for me to just be thankful and know that lupus has been a blessing to my work in that I was given a gift to be able to see what it would be like to be sick or elderly, but to get to return to the life before (It's a Wonderful Life-esque). I often say, I understand, I was old once.

That said, I hope everyone had a wonderful week, or at least a little better than mine. I think Georgia's pollen has gotten the best of me. I have never before in my life had allergies, but I think here I do. If perhaps I could just find the cure for my swollen throat and cough, things would be better. These symptoms waxed and waned all week and I went from suspicions of allergies to a cold to the flu and back around again. And yesterday I woke up with pink eye! But as it turned out, it was the best I felt all week. It had spread to the other eye by this morning, but I went on to my class anyway. I didn't work at all this week besides the class today. I am hoping with starting to take some allergy medicine on a regular basis, I'll be able to live normally again. Sorry to be so whiny, but I finally understand what all the allergy sufferers have been talking about!

I was given more than an hour for lunch today and the weather was so nice, I just got out my GPS and decided to navigate to the closest park the GPS knew about. I ended up in a lovely little spot, hardly a park, but with a pond and lots of ducks and a very quaint feel. Of course, pollen was hanging in the air so thick you could see it, but it didn't seem to exacerbate anything. Husband and I are going to a baseball game tonight, at least for a little while. I guess the excursion is aimed at the international students since they said they would provide a sheet with the rules and mechanics of the game.

We have a meeting tomorrow with an agency to find an apartment (still not definite that we're moving, but we'll keep you posted) and possibly the Renaissance Fair!

I have Lupus...and spoons

2010-04-12T03:51:00.000-04:00

Welcome to my blog! This is probably the first time a few of you have been here and I'll thank Rachel Anne for sending you. I asked Rachel to help me out to share something important.

Systemic lupus erythematosus is an autoimmune disease that causes your immune system to be almost over-active and start attacking your own body. This disease affects mostly women of childbearing age (doctors think female hormones may have something to do with it) and is more common in minorities. We say lupus patients are like snowflakes--no two are alike. Most of us have joint pain that can be debilitating at times and most of us experience extreme fatigue. A lot of people have a rash across the bridge of their nose, sometimes called a "butterfly rash" and sun sensitivity. A lot of times it can just be a general feeling of "unwellness", like the flu, even with a fever. It can affect almost any system of your body. My lupus affects my kidneys.

I was diagnosed the summer after my freshman year in college and it only took a couple months after the first suspicious medical test to be diagnosed. Unfortunately, because I didn't realize what was happening, I lived with the symptoms for about two years. Because the symptoms of lupus can be vague if it does not affect a major body system, diagnosis is very difficult. There is no specific test for general lupus. I was diagnosed because of my kidney symptoms through a biopsy. Many people don't realize what is happening to them or doctors can't make sense of their symptoms. You might just sound whiny.

When I was in college, I realized that the group of people most likely to have lupus was the least likely to know anything about it. Practically no one I knew at school knew what lupus was or anyone else who had it. That's why I participate in lupus awareness events. I didn't stop to think that something could be wrong with me when I was feeling lousy and it was just lucky I had a urine test that uncovered some strange results. Since mine was in my kidneys, not doing anything and allowing that damage to occur would have resulted in some serious issues. There are many people who don't realize that lupus is very treatable, but untreated it is life-threatening.

I have been in remission now for two years last month and there's really nothing I can't do now. The reason I am well is because I take all of my medications and I get plenty of rest. I know of people with lupus who don't want to have to take medications all the time or miss out on things so they don't take care of themselves. It's really important and I'm proof that just maintenance of your disease can afford you the chance to live normally.

May is Lupus Awareness month and many local chapters of the Lupus Foundation have walks in the first weeks of May. If you're interested in more information about walks in your area or your local chapter or just more about lupus, visit www.lupus.org

I realize that there may be women reading this who don't have lupus, but may have MS, RA, or fibromyalgia, or another similar disease. I'd like to also refer you to the website butyoudontlooksick.com. There's a great essay there I'll go ahead and post here. I'll preface this by saying that this is not at all the type of life I have now, but this is what I experienced for a couple years. Simple tasks can be really difficult and the energy isn't always present. Thanks for reading:

The Spoon Theory

by Christine Miserandino www.butyoudontlooksick.com

My best friend and I were in the diner, talking. As usual, it was very late and we were eating French fries with gravy. Like normal girls our age, we spent a lot of time in the diner while in college, and most of the time we spent talking about boys, music or trivial things, that seemed very important at the time. We never got serious about anything in particular and spent most of our time laughing.

As I went to take some of my medicine with a snack as I usually did, she watched me with an awkward kind of stare, instead of continuing the conversation. She then asked me out of the blue what it felt like to have Lupus and be sick. I was shocked not only because she asked the random question, but also because I assumed she knew all there was to know about Lupus. She came to doctors with me, she saw me walk with a cane, and throw up in the bathroom. She had seen me cry in pain, what else was there to know?

I started to ramble on about pills, and aches and pains, but she kept pursuing, and didn’t seem satisfied with my answers. I was a little surprised as being my roommate in college and friend for years; I thought she already knew the medical definition of Lupus. Then she looked at me with a face every sick person knows well, the face of pure curiosity about something no one healthy can truly understand. She asked what it felt like, not physically, but what it felt like to be me, to be sick.

As I tried to gain my composure, I glanced around the table for help or guidance, or at least stall for time to think. I was trying to find the right words. How do I answer a question I never was able to answer for myself? How do I explain every detail of every day being effected, and give the emotions a sick person goes through with clarity. I could have given up, cracked a joke like I usually do, and changed the subject, but I remember thinking if I don’t try to explain this, how could I ever expect her to understand. If I can’t explain this to my best friend, how could I explain my world to anyone else? I had to at least try.

At that moment, the spoon theory was born. I quickly grabbed every spoon on the table; hell I grabbed spoons off of the other tables. I looked at her in the eyes and said “Here you go, you have Lupus”. She looked at me slightly confused, as anyone would when they are being handed a bouquet of spoons. The cold metal spoons clanked in my hands, as I grouped them together and shoved them into her hands.

I explained that the difference in being sick and being healthy is having to make choices or to consciously think about things when the rest of the world doesn’t have to. The healthy have the luxury of a life without choices, a gift most people take for granted.

Most people start the day with unlimited amount of possibilities, and energy to do whatever they desire, especially young people. For the most part, they do not need to worry about the effects of their actions. So for my explanation, I used spoons to convey this point. I wanted something for her to actually hold, for me to then take away, since most people who get sick feel a “loss” of a life they once knew. If I was in control of taking away the spoons, then she would know what it feels like to have someone or something else, in this case Lupus, being in control.

She grabbed the spoons with excitement. She didn’t understand what I was doing, but she is always up for a good time, so I guess she thought I was cracking a joke of some kind like I usually do when talking about touchy topics. Little did she know how serious I would become?

I asked her to count her spoons. She asked why, and I explained that when you are healthy you expect to have a never-ending supply of “spoons”. But when you have to now plan your day, you need to know exactly how many “spoons” you are starting with. It doesn’t guarantee that you might not lose some along the way, but at least it helps to know where you are starting. She counted out 12 spoons. She laughed and said she wanted more. I said no, and I knew right away that this little game would work, when she looked disappointed, and we hadn’t even started yet. I’ve wanted more “spoons” for years and haven’t found a way yet to get more, why should she? I also told her to always be conscious of how many she had, and not to drop them because she can never forget she has Lupus.

I asked her to list off the tasks of her day, including the most simple. As, she rattled off daily chores, or just fun things to do; I explained how each one would cost her a spoon. When she jumped right into getting ready for work as her first task of the morning, I cut her off and took away a spoon. I practically jumped down her throat. I said ” No! You don’t just get up. You have to crack open your eyes, and then realize you are late. You didn’t sleep well the night before. You have to crawl out of bed, and then you have to make your self something to eat before you can do anything else, because if you don’t, you can’t take your medicine, and if you don’t take your medicine you might as well give up all your spoons for today and tomorrow too.” I quickly took away a spoon and she realized she hasn’t even gotten dressed yet. Showering cost her spoon, just for washing her hair and shaving her legs. Reaching high and low that early in the morning could actually cost more than one spoon, but I figured I would give her a break; I didn’t want to scare her right away. Getting dressed was worth another spoon. I stopped her and broke down every task to show her how every little detail needs to be thought about. You cannot simply just throw clothes on when you are sick. I explained that I have to see what clothes I can physically put on, if my hands hurt that day buttons are out of the question. If I have bruises that day, I need to wear long sleeves, and if I have a fever I need a sweater to stay warm and so on. If my hair is falling out I need to spend more time to look presentable, and then you need to factor in another 5 minutes for feeling badly that it took you 2 hours to do all this.

I think she was starting to understand when she theoretically didn’t even get to work, and she was left with 6 spoons. I then explained to her that she needed to choose the rest of her day wisely, since when your “spoons” are gone, they are gone. Sometimes you can borrow against tomorrow’s “spoons”, but just think how hard tomorrow will be with less “spoons”. I also needed to explain that a person who is sick always lives with the looming thought that tomorrow may be the day that a cold comes, or an infection, or any number of things that could be very dangerous. So you do not want to run low on “spoons”, because you never know when you truly will need them. I didn’t want to depress her, but I needed to be realistic, and unfortunately being prepared for the worst is part of a real day for me.

We went through the rest of the day, and she slowly learned that skipping lunch would cost her a spoon, as well as standing on a train, or even typing at her computer too long. She was forced to make choices and think about things differently. Hypothetically, she had to choose not to run errands, so that she could eat dinner that night.

When we got to the end of her pretend day, she said she was hungry. I summarized that she had to eat dinner but she only had one spoon left. If she cooked, she wouldn’t have enough energy to clean the pots. If she went out for dinner, she might be too tired to drive home safely. Then I also explained, that I didn’t even bother to add into this game, that she was so nauseous, that cooking was probably out of the question anyway. So she decided to make soup, it was easy. I then said it is only 7pm, you have the rest of the night but maybe end up with one spoon, so you can do something fun, or clean your apartment, or do chores, but you can’t do it all.

I rarely see her emotional, so when I saw her upset I knew maybe I was getting through to her. I didn’t want my friend to be upset, but at the same time I was happy to think finally maybe someone understood me a little bit. She had tears in her eyes and asked quietly “Christine, How do you do it? Do you really do this everyday?” I explained that some days were worse then others; some days I have more spoons then most. But I can never make it go away and I can’t forget about it, I always have to think about it. I handed her a spoon I had been holding in reserve. I said simply, “I have learned to live life with an extra spoon in my pocket, in reserve. You need to always be prepared.”

Its hard, the hardest thing I ever had to learn is to slow down, and not do everything. I fight this to this day. I hate feeling left out, having to choose to stay home, or to not get things done that I want to. I wanted her to feel that frustration. I wanted her to understand, that everything everyone else does comes so easy, but for me it is one hundred little jobs in one. I need to think about the weather, my temperature that day, and the whole day’s plans before I can attack any one given thing. When other people can simply do things, I have to attack it and make a plan like I am strategizing a war. It is in that lifestyle, the difference between being sick and healthy. It is the beautiful ability to not think and just do. I miss that freedom. I miss never having to count “spoons”.

After we were emotional and talked about this for a little while longer, I sensed she was sad. Maybe she finally understood. Maybe she realized that she never could truly and honestly say she understands. But at least now she might not complain so much when I can’t go out for dinner some nights, or when I never seem to make it to her house and she always has to drive to mine. I gave her a hug when we walked out of the diner. I had the one spoon in my hand and I said “Don’t worry. I see this as a blessing. I have been forced to think about everything I do. Do you know how many spoons people waste everyday? I don’t have room for wasted time, or wasted “spoons” and I chose to spend this time with you.”

Ever since this night, I have used the spoon theory to explain my life to many people. In fact, my family and friends refer to spoons all the time. It has been a code word for what I can and cannot do. Once people understand the spoon theory they seem to understand me better, but I also think they live their life a little differently too. I think it isn’t just good for understanding Lupus, but anyone dealing with any disability or illness. Hopefully, they don’t take so much for granted or their life in general. I give a piece of myself, in every sense of the word when I do anything. It has become an inside joke. I have become famous for saying to people jokingly that they should feel special when I spend time with them, because they have one of my “spoons”.

Ah ah ah ah ah-le-lu-u-ia!

2010-04-04T21:37:00.003-04:00

Happy Easter, everyone! He is risen! We have had a wonderful Easter weekend and I hope yours was good as well.

Our trip to Red Top mountain wasn't exactly what we expected. We never really saw the mountain and it never got sunny (or warm), but we hiked around eight miles and had a good time. We had bean and cheese burritos for dinner, which turned out to be our most successful meatless meal (in my opinion).
I worked the weekend and therefore missed Palm Sunday, but Brice went to church on campus and we had some awesome leftover bleu cheese burgers and garlic and rosemary pork tenderloin with mashed potatoes and gravy (such a fan of this).

I enjoyed a day off on Monday and had my last Fellowship Tuesday and one of the last Residency classes on Thursday. We went to a "southern cooking" class on Tuesday and sampled some food. Since the complex is extremely international, we were one of only a handful of Americans in the first place and turned out to be technically more southern than the guy teaching it. Unfortunately, when asked to confirm authenticity, I had to confess that I did not drink sweet tea, had never even bought a sweet potato and only began eating cornbread for the first time a couple years ago (and I'm pretty sure none of these items were ever made in our house growing up, but correct me if I'm wrong, Mom). They also played country music in the background, since obviously, that is the only type of music to which southern people listen...
We had chili this week too, but it just did not have the heat we like. There was plenty of cayenne pepper and two jalepenos, so I'm not sure what the problem was... Does cayenne lose its heat after a certain amount of time? I made corn nuggets to go along with it--they are awesome! (gluten-free and so easy) So I guess I'm well on my way to being a good southern cook since I fried them two nights in a row and actually saved my oil in a jar! (Dad: save all manner of bacon grease--you will be instructed what to do with it later.)
Brice made pancakes and eggs for our Friday dinner since I had to work. Not a bad day and I got some of my worksheets turned in. At the end of the month I have to go to a "skills day" and review skills and take a test. I have a book to study beforehand about half an inch of 8.5x11 paper-sized and I also have my reassessment coming up May 11th. So I should be doing some studying and working in my free time this month. This is something that already seems long ago to me...
Uncharacteristically, we got out of the house before 11 yesterday because we wanted to be at the park and there was a forecast for rain starting at noon. We never saw this rain, but we had a great walk and hit the library, BB&B for a return, and had lunch at Bojangles'. The weather here has been downright amazing. The temperature is perfect and it's just sunny and gorgeous. It was great driving around with the windows down so we decided to do some apartment browsing. There wasn't a lot in the area we'd like to be in, but there are some really beautiful neighborhoods with rolling hills and tons of trees and a mixture of regular and whoa-look-at-that type houses. (none for rent though) We took a little tour of one complex and the floorplan most likely to suit us, but it's not much of a contender. My kitchen and pantry are so much better here.
We had a pizza with pepperoni for the first time since before Lent last night and then went out to Atlantic Station to browse for Brice and make a return. We ended up just sitting on a bench there for awhile enjoying the weather--again. It might sound old, but it only lasts for so long before it gets ruined by muggy air and bugs. I love the time before the bugs. We came home and watched "The invention of lying", which was pretty good, funny and entertaining. I think Redbox is the best movie situation for us since Brice is quite a critic and we often aren't sure what we really want. We can pick something and if it's not good, we always know it was only a dollar.

Our Easter had hints of Christmas mixed in today as there was a tendency toward no room in the sanctuary. This morning we had plans to go to the Lutheran church downtown. When we got there it was quite busy and we were turned away and sent to a hall where there was a projection screen of the sanctuary and standing room only. After a couple minutes we thought, we can still make a 10:30 or 11 somewhere, let's go. We ran to the car and drove up to CTK where there was a major traffic issue. We were turned away from the cathedral and parish hall Masses and sent to the gym at the school. We ended up packed like 6th graders (a reference for NWMS alumni) into bleachers with plenty of people standing. On the upside, we did get the archbishop for our Mass over the other two he could have led. I think ours had most of the "birth and resurrection" attendees because the place was about half empty after communion and people seemed rusty on when to stand and sit. We ended up having to be a couple of the "leavers" because we had both completely forgotten Brice needed to work in the lab. We did get to be in the archbishop's line for communion though.

Since my husband gave up chocolate for Lent, he got some special treats today. The Easter bunny left him a large, solid chocolate bunny and a couple other treats, but lots of poop everywhere. Tasted like black jelly beans though... And because he had been so good, I made a batch of chocolate chip cookies and Rice Krispy treat eggs:We did this instead of dying eggs this year since neither one of us likes hardboiled eggs and blown or wooden would have just been something else to store (where?).

Our Easter dinner was non-traditional but awesome. We had country style ribs and peppers and onions that we took outside to one of the charcoal grills in the courtyard. All of it turned out perfectly and we enjoyed our dinner at the picnic table in--you guessed it--perfect weather. We even roasted a marshmallow and a Peep each.

Yes, life has been quite good lately, so no blog posts just means we're enjoying it. I'll be on days still until May, so that was some good news this week. Next weekend Brice is going to the Masters with family and I plan to tag along to hang out at his grandma's nearby. She has a birthday coming up and she shares the month with lots of other people. Between our two families, we have 12 birthdays and one anniversary this month. My family thought July was a big deal...

One last item...I just finished Summer at Tiffany. It was great, and I can't think of hardly any woman in my family or friends who wouldn't enjoy it.